5 Little known facts about MOI

1. I started out my "acting career" as a dancing bunny in our Primary School Production of "Winnie the Pooh".

2. I worked for the Anglican Church one Summer - in the Christchurch Cathedral to be exact.

3. Will(iam) Mariner, whom Mariner's Cave in Tonga is named after, is my Great, Great, Great, Great Grandfather (give or take a "Great").

4. Somewhere in Taiwan there is an icecream poster(s) with me on it! (it was an SJS job)

5. Pink bikkies with hundreds and thousands were my FAV bikkies as a child.

The big PC and the Santa Dilemma (not what you'd expect)

Well, ......this is going to be quite the different blog from what it was going to be. What was it going to be?

Well, ...my friend recently posted on her blog about what I shall refer to as the Santa Dilemma. This whole idea that "lying" to our children about Santa - a fictional character, invented by Coca Cola for Commercial and Capitalistic gain, and "based" on a fairytale and lore embellished Saint Nick - will have such a drastic effect on their lives that it will cause them to lose all faith in us and consequently, potentially lose faith in their faith.

Well

This was going to be a post all about how I considered this had all come about thanks to the large all-encompassing shadow of PC - namely Political Correctness - it's got everyone, particularly parents, running scared. It was going to mention how perfectly sound moral stories like Red Riding Hood have been irreparably and heinously ruined by the effects of PC - as in the instance where I saw a version that belonged to my niece, several years ago now, wherein Red and her Granny were rescued from the Wolf by the Woodsman (that much is the same at least) but instead of the Woodsman logically and realistically chasing off or killing the Wolf for their own safety - he is instead let go, albeit after a HARSH reprimand by the Woodsman. SERIOUSLY??

Well, it was going to be about that.

It was also going to be about such unbelievable things as iconic childrens' characters altered beyond belief such as Cookie Monster now eating fruits and veges and cookies only being a "sometimes" food. He is a COOKIE MONSTER. For goodness sake!

Also apparently The Count (also from Sesame St) no longer laughs after he counts - apparently it was too scary for some children so they cut that out. REALLLLLY??

Well, it was going to be about all of that. It was. And how I believed that Santa had just become really another victim of PC Paranoia. It was at least until I saw this picture - Bear and his class and the rest of the Junior School had a whole fun day out today as part of the 4th to last day of school. As part of this they went to Cadbury World and Bear had THIS picture taken with Santa. DODGY Santa I call him. Don't you think?

Bear and Dodgy Santa - look at that Dodgy look on his face!

Here are my comments as Fuzz perused the picture:

Me: That Santa looks DODGY!! DODGY Santa! What is that up with that DODGY Santa sitting next to OUR Bear with his hand near his BOTTOM! Look at that DODGY look on his face!! And is that a BED they're sitting on?!?!!!

Fuzz shakes with silent laughter as he peruses and I continue to comment.

Me: Do they do a CHECK on these Santas before they let them sit there ALL DAY and have pictures with LITTLE kids sitting on their knee?? I mean LOOK at him! DODGY Santa!

Seriously disturbing - NO child should have a Christmas where THIS Santa is included. If EVER there were a reason NOT to include Santa in Christmas this picture would be the CAMPAIGN POSTER!

It's torches and pitchforks time...

I'll let the pictures and videos speak for themselves - but also add some info not shown in photo form:
Picked up several pieces of paper and plastic rubbish lying about the place, TWO picnic bar wrappers (boys allergic), a sneaker-boot and some kind of filth-streaked pikachu toy - just yesterday ALONE. When weeding along the fence line I found the roses and rose branches that one of the neighbours' daughters had specifically requested when she saw we were trimming and pruning - apparently just so she could change her mind and dump them back over the fence when we weren't looking.

Last week on Friday I discovered a giant orange safety cone - no doubt stolen from the DCC roadworks on Hillside Rd and carted about 3 or so blocks to our house, uphill (they're REALLY committed to being jerks it seems - good on them), and dumped behind our letterbox.

Today our recycling bin has "disappeared". It costs $12 to replace ORRRR I send the police round asking them to return our bin. Nice and friendly like. OR I call our friend at DCC Animal Control to come and take away their annoying dog - actually that would probably be more like rescuing the dog....

Did I mention that earlier this week, in a rather saint-like act of good will that I gave them ALL a ride to school when we ourselves were late AND their ride didn't show?

Anyway,....as I'm "mulling" over all of this I'm SO trying to imagine the "Going on a Bear Hunt" song but with "witch" substituted in instead of "Bear".

GUTTED

I think I may just have done something that means that I have thoughtlessly robbed myself (and others in my family) of several weeks, nay months even, of rip-roaring amusement!!

Bear got sprayed in the weekend by his bottle of fizzy that someone had obviously given a good shaking (I feel this is a somewhat necessary precursor to the following story)

We were sitting at dinner and Bear picked up Monk's water bottle from the table. He proceeded to shake it fiercely. He then cautiously uncapped the top and peered gingerly through the hole - nothing. He re-capped the bottle and proceeded to shake the bottle vigorously again. Again he carefully opened the bottle top and peered expectantly inside - nothing. He repeated this process again and again - several times - each time with the same result. AND with me quietly bemused, watching the whole thing. Finally, I let him in on a little secret - "Bear - it's filled with water. NOTHING'S gonna happen."

Almost immediately afterwards I felt the first smarting pangs of regret - what had I done?? Weeks of entertainment, thrown carelessly and thoughlessly away.....!

DARN.

SERIOUSLY though....

I'm not the only one who sees these and thinks "Adult nappy covers?" - right?? RIGHT?!?!?!!

Christmas-y Highlights and Random Thoughts

Wombat hiding in the Christmas tree box and us pretending we can't see/find him.

Wombat's seal of approval (manic dancing) of a youtube selection of Boney M Christmas songs.

How cool would it be to have a Boney M Christmas album.

Chris informs me that our new Christmas tree has 872 tips (branches to be fluffed out) - correction 871 (one broke) - and that consequently the tree will have to stay out ALL. YEAR. ROUND.

Monk inquires whether we will be decorating tonight after we have put the tree up.

Chris further comments that he thinks it will take us FOUR days to put the new Christmas tree up - THREE of those will just be for putting the actual tree up : P

Before I even see the tree Monk comes and tells me (as I weed the garden's brick path) that the new tree is 6ft - that they could've got the 7ft tree but they got the 6ft tree.

Never one to miss out on an opportunity - as soon as we enter the lounge and I see the tree in its box - clearly barely taller than our tallest child - I immediately exclaim in mock outrage:

"Why, that tree's NOT 6ft!! It's barely even taller than YOU!"

My clever wit - clearly too clever for our children - completely lost on the children who insist that the tree is 6ft - pointing out to me on the box exactly where it says 6ft! My moment of comic brilliance lost.

Wish I hadn't neglected to recharge the camera batteries so I could have photographed Chris' frustration and annoyance at fluffing out 872/1 fake Christmas tree branches.

Bear decided he would impersonate a parrot with the broken Christmas tree branch. VERY convincing.

Feliz Navidad everyone!!

PS - I think Chris should be grateful they got the 6fter

Oh the irony....!

"Stay out of the kitchen!!!!" I yell at the Wombat as I'm stooped over the floor picking up large pieces of a ceramic bowl he accidentally knocked to the floor - of course, as I am loudly warning my child to stay out of the kitchen or else he may be hurt or cut I manage to simultaneously slice the ring finger on my right hand. Of course.

Things I just don't get #2

*People who almost do things, but then for some reason decide not to - for instance, the other day I was pushing my trolley out of the supermarket with my groceries all packed up. In front of me was a guy with an empty trolley. He too was pushing his trolley. He pushed it all the way to the trolley bay near the doors (a few feet away), right to the end of several rows of trolleys - he looked like he was going to add his trolley to one of the rows - but nooooo! He didn't. He just left it there cross-ways of the rows of trolleys simultaneously blocking people off from trolleys and also blocking the way if you were removing a trolley - WHO does THAT!??!??

*People who drive at 60k on an 80k limit MOTORWAY and yet seem completely incapable of keeping to residential area speed limits - WHAT. IS. WRONG. WITH. THEM????!!!

*Why people persist in trying to find a part or parts that are edible of poisonous substances eg. Fugu aka Puffer Fish, Red Kidney Beans etc - what, specifically, makes someone think - ok, well, yes, those first 50 or so people may have died from eating this...but that doesn't mean that ALL of it is poisonous and I'll be darned if we're not going to keep trying and find that edible part!! - I mean, REALLY? Who is THAT desperate for food? Who are they trying to impress?

*Garlic Hummus. GAAAAAH. I know, I know, I've mentioned this before - but now there is an actual flavour named JUST that. It's REALLY annoying. Really.

Dodged that bullet!!

The Monk informed me this evening that all he wants for Christmas is the jetpack he just saw on the News on tv - phew! That's a relief. And here I was worried he might request something COMPLETELY ridiculous.

What the heyyyyyy...??

I can add pictures on this blog, but don't seem to be able to on Anarashii - what gives??

Anyone else with this problem?

SUMMER SALE at Ami-Ana

It's decided. I'm having a Summer Sale over at Ami-Ana! (even though "Summer" is technically officially a few weeks away)

The plan is for it to be a gradual sale with me discounting and featuring/announcing items that have joined the Summer Sale ranks over time.

So to start it all off here is a pic of the first official Ami-Ana Summer Sale item!

Available at both Ami-Ana on Etsy as well as Ami-Ana on Felt. I will also create an Ami-Ana Summer Sale photo album over at the Ami-Ana FB page and will add to it as I announce each new sale item so keep an eye out there too. This stunner was originally $89NZ, then it was discounted to $75NZ - and now it's practically a steal at $50NZ ($38.50USD - awesome if you live in the US!). Please note - This special Summer Sale price will last only last as long as there are ponchos left! Be quick! ; )

Happy Summer Christmas shopping!
OR just happy Summer Sale shopping!

Do my EARS deceive me??

I am by now well accustomed and will readily admit to the foul smell of grilling capsicum - on previous occasions when I have grilled/roasted it for making hummus it has repeatedly set off the smoke alarm in our lounge - hence, I am now somewhat of an old hand at this and consequently open all the windows and doors that one can within reason - in anticipation!

As my boys and hubby returned home from school this afternoon they were greeted with the mere beginnings of the putrid scent of grilling capsicum. I must say they all play the tortured victim rather well - for duration of the grilling process husband and children alike held their noses and moaned and groaned about the foulness and torturous-ness of it all. That is all the children bar one. Whilst his older brothers groaned loudly and incessantly, clutching their noses with pained faces - the wombat, as per usual, attempted to copy all this "older brother" stuff - pained face - check. Boisterous complaining - check. Pinched nose - ba-bow.

It seemed somewhere along the way that the wombat got a bit confused and instead of pinching his nose to block out the heinous scent he instead feverishly covered his ears.

UNBEARABLY cute and amusing!

FINE!!

This is what I automatically think of when I hear the word "fine".

Lazy Domesticity #3

A couple of weeks ago a bunch of us all got together and had a big potluck to farewell a couple of friends off who were moving to Oz - I made this or at least a variation thereof and a number of friends commented on it so I've decided it's only fair that I "share the joy".

And YES this is another one of my so-called "default" meals.

Differences between "my" lasagne and the recipe on the foodinaminute website - As a mother I'm going for simplicity (what I have readily available) as well as what my boys will eat - I don't readily have canned chilli beans available nor will my boys eat spicy foods (which let's be honest a lot of foods that claim to be "mild" still are) so these are swapped out for a can of regular baked beans without a second thought. Green capsicum - if I have it, it goes in. Tomato paste - also "optional" in my opinion - if I have some I put it in. Parsley - not a fan, so I'm not gonna rush out to buy it especially for this. Parmesan - although I DO buy it to make pesto with - is SMELLY - kids don't like smelly - so I just use regular mild cheese. I grate with the side of the grater with the smallest holes so that I can get more volume with less cheese. I also don't serve this with guacamole.
HOWEVER - I DO add a few things - one grated carrot and at least one grated zucchini when I add the can of beans, and sometimes I add ripped spinach/silverbeet leaves if I have them. Also if EVERYONE in the fam loved mushrooms then I would no doubt add sliced mushrooms as well - YUM. I have also used cream cheese when I didn't have cottage cheese available.

Also here's a little variation I did once with some Venison Chris cooked up.

Why no photos? you ask. Our computer went bust a week or so ago and it is STILL away being fixed so we are living off our laptop. Superspeed - Yes. All our regular, familiar programmes, pictures etc - No.

Super Speed is good though. Not knocking super speed.

Anyway - I digress - hope you all enjoy and perhaps try some variations of your own! I am dying to try a variation using a delicious lentil spaghetti sauce recipe I know mmmmmm - that another time perhaps!

Oddities

One of Chris' lame attempts to irk me.


Don't get it? I like spoons to face down after being washed - otherwise water pools in them and they stain/get marked.

Just one of my oddities.

Things that DON'T impress me

I'm thinking that people who speed think they are pretty impressive - well, I'm here to tell you:
You're NOT. You're just a faster than average idiot. ESPECIALLY if it's raining*.



*Or other extreme/hazardous weather conditions.

SKANKY campaign for the foolhardy and gullible

I just had to comment on this because it's going around FB and it's just SO repulsive to me - I don't see how ANYONE could think this was a good idea.

THIRD time I've received this message:

One of my friends has suggested that we women should do something special on facebook in order to increase awareness of October Breast Cancer Awareness month. It's so easy to do, that I'd love you to join in to make this a memorable online event.
Last year, the idea was to post the colour of the bra you were wearing on facebook...and it left men wondering for days, why women were posting colours, seemingly at random.
This year's game has to do with your handbag/purse, where we put our handbag the moment we get home; for example "I like it on the couch", "I like it on the kitchen counter", "I like it on the dresser". Well u get the idea. Just put your answer as your status (i.e. don't respond to this message, but put it on your status) - and cut n paste this message and forward to all your FB female friends to their inbox.
The bra game made it to the news. Let's get the purse in as well and see how powerful we women really are!!!
REMEMBER - DO NOT PUT YOUR ANSWER AS A REPLY TO THIS MESSAGE- PUT IT IN YOUR STATUS!!! PASS THIS TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW

After receiving this insulting message THREE times I finally "cracked" and responded thus:

This "campaign" is SOOOOO skanky. WHO would portray themselves in such a skanky, repulsive way or insinuate such things about themselves "supposedly" in the name of "breast cancer awareness" - what a JOKE!! In fact I'm sure that's what this all is - an innuendo filled rubbish campaign designed by some sexed up male (who's sitting laughing his head off somewhere that so many women could be SO easily suckered) designed to get women worldwide to portray themselves as whoring garbage. Are we REALLY willing to show that we are THIS stupid??? HOW exactly does this raise awareness for breast cancer......?

Payback's a .....Louse?

Yup. You read that right. First - some background on this. About a week ago our poor little wombat lost his hat. HIS hat. The hat that is practically (Chris and I concluded) "Essence" of Wombat :(

Here is a pic of our wee guy in HIS hat

Wombat and I were at the Super Market and he was being silly with said treasured hat - a Knitted Brown Wool cap with a crocheted peak made with love by none other than ME!!! - anyway, he was being silly with his hat and dangling it over the side of the trolley and then when we got to the counter to pay I realised he had dropped it somewhere along the way. We paid and then went back to look but to no avail. We also left our name and number at the Customer Service's desk in case some kind person should hand it in - alas, it seemed the Super Market was just plum out of kind persons that particular day wouldn't you know it.

Wombat was pretty gutted. He stopped me as we left the Super Market and insisted we had forgotten his hat and that we needed to go back for it. I informed him that it now belonged to someone else. That that's what happens when you're "silly" with your stuff. That he had lost it and that someone else had picked it up, thinking themselves lucky no doubt, and not handing it - some mean, nasty, conscience-less fiend had picked it up and kept it....yup. The next time we went to the Super Market the Wombat inquired after his hat AGAIN and I had to AGAIN inform him that he had lost it and some unscrupulous opportunist had discovered it and absconded with it. I secretly prayed that although someone else was now enjoying HIS hat, that REALLY, somewhere deep down inside they were being totally and completely consumed with GUILT.

Turns out I needn't have wasted the time dreaming up such a wish. Karma it seems is as automatic as NZ Post's Insurance inclusive prices for packages under a certain contents' value! How so? you ask. Well,....a few days ago I happened to discover that the Wombat has NITS. HEADLICE that is. His hair is RIDDLED with eggs!!! Also when we treated his hair and scalp with MOOV (fabulous stuff!!!) and rinsed it out in the shower, his head fairly "rained" dead lice - quite impressive really. So now,...I'm feeling rather calm and happy and totally not wishing an impossibly guilt ridden life on my baby's hat's stealer (does that make sense? Grammatically?). Nope. Rather I'm hoping this mystery person or their child is wearing it well.

Actually I can't seem to stop myself snickering evilly, gleefully even* (yes - both silent and right out loud) at the mere thought of the unexpected consequences of their dastardly actions - muaaahhhahahahahhaaaa.

Payback's a LOUSE.

*When I snicker gleefully over this in my head I imagine my laugh sounding not too dissimilar to Dash's laugh when he discovers he can run on water.

Na na na na naaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...

Yesterday I told Chris/Fuzz:
"The Partridge family cut through our property today."
Fuzz: Whaaa..? What?
Me: That's my way of saying a BUS LOAD of people cut through our place today.

A BUS LOAD you say incredulously - why yes.

The neighbour. Her THREE children. Rebecca Robinson (other neighbour) from the "condemned house". And some tall, lanky, unindentified, school-uniformed, heavy-footed boy, galloping down our drive like a horse. All at once.

Oh no - don't mind ME, I just live here. Go right ahead *gritted teeth*


PS - the title is supposed to be some lame reference of mine to the Partridge Family.

Shark Attack Hat on Etsy by "ObeyMyBrain"

I thought this would be the perfect understated halloween outfit for a guy. Chris didn't think so. He said it was stupid.

I can just imagine wearing it and pretending it wasn't there to see if you could get a bite.

"What? A shark on my head? What on earth are you talking about??"

Lazy domesticity #2

At long last....Numero 2 in my mental list of easy peasy "from scratch" default (read lazy) meals - "Bisto Steak"

You will need:

A family pack of Chuck Steak (I've found Chuck steak to be consistently tender even more so than expensive so-called tender meats like Porterhouse and Rump Steak)

Onions

Carrots

Peas/Celery/Zucchini

Bisto gravy mix ( I buy it by the box)

Potatoes

Kumara

Mushrooms

water

Potatoe peeler

Knife/knives ( I use a heavier larger knife for the root veges and a smaller, lighter paring knife for the softer veges like mushrooms/celery/zucchini)

Large oblong shaped dish

Preheat oven to 180 Celsius (approx. 350 F or adjust to suit with gas ovens).

Fill your dish with a little bit of water - less than a centimetre in depth (this will make a nice gravy when cooked as opposed to a watery broth).Chop onions and chuck them in. Cut Steak into palm sized medallions and arrange over the onions - no overlapping!

Sprinkle over one tablespoon of bisto powder. Peel and slice carrots (I cut mine on an angle) - scatter carrots and your choice of peas, sliced celery or zucchini (or all three! My family is not keen on celery or zucchini as options but either are nice - the zucchini especially!) Sprinkle over two more tablespoons of bisto powder.

Peel and cut potatotes and kumara - leave smallish potatoes whole, cut very large potatoes in half or even 3 pieces.

Wash and cut mushrooms in chunky pieces and scatter over top. Sprinkle 2 more tablespoons of bisto powder over top. Cover with tin foil and cook for an hour and half - even better if your dish has a lid use that!

When finished test potatoes and kumara - they should be perfect and meat nice and tender. Eat with salad or other cooked veges like broccoli. Delish!....and EASY!!

Chris often cooks this too and people are always impressed cos it looks like such hard work - muahahahhahaaaaa!

Post Scriptus...

(following on from previous post)

Fuzz: Just what kind of things can you do with these mind powers of yours?

Me: (with raised eyebrow and mysterious sultry look) Wouldn't YOU like to know.....?

What sarcasm...?

Me - YELLING - literally to get his attention - to "Bear" (the middle child): Did you have your puffas (inhaler) this morning?

B: N.O. NO.

Me: How about you have them right now then?

B: How about you get them down for me so I can have them then?

Me: (sitting at the table eating my lunch) Well hang on a minute and I'll use my mind powers to get them down from the cupboard for you (raise hand to touch the right temple and scrunch eyes with an intense focused facial expression)

(from the kitchen - Fuzz: You have mind powers?!?!?!!! (Yes and Nod from me) Whoa!!!)

What I KNOW.....

Was at a surprise birthday party for a very good friend last night. The party had barely started when another friend's husband filled his cup a little too much and before you know - over flowing coke everywhere! What does the male do/say?
G: Love! Love! Love! Help, help, help! (followed by running away)
Friend M begins to mop up spilt drink with serviettes. G watches on and nods - us girls "descend" on G, mocking and disparaging him for running away from his own mess like a helpless git.
G turns to me - It's woman's work - you KNOW this.
Me: All I know is that you will be buying a rather large, exorbitant gift to make up for this (*wink* at M)
M smiles and nods in agreement.

Classic.

Felt auction for Christchurch, NZ

I chatted briefly with Lucy from Felt tonight - consoling each other over the lost heritage of historic Christchurch buildings since the 7.1 strength earthquake (and continuing after shocks) on Saturday morning, the inevitably changed landscape of the CBD and the various inspiring and honourable initiatives that have been started in the earthquake's wake. Someone had asked Lucy if Felt would be doing anything to help with the effort - I commented that this could be problematic considering the varied crafts that were available from various stores on Felt - but then I had a light bulb moment! We could ask individual Felt stores to donate items for an auction - the proceeds of which to be donated to the clean-up and rebuilding of Christchurch - that could work!!

Soooo.....here is the plug - PLEASE if you own a Felt store, or know someone who does - please consider donating an item from your store or two or SEVERAL!! Let's do our part to help Christchurch back on her feet!

ALSO - we didn't get so far as to discuss where we would send all the donated items to or where and when the auction would be held so please feel free to suggest - I've also posted about this on the Felt Forum, on my facebook Ami Ana fan page and will also be posting on my other blog Anarashii. Please feel free to post about this yourself on your FB page, your blog, where ever and spread the word to other Felt-ers :D

Before.......and After.....Aaaaaahhhhh!!

Good bye.....!

See ya!

Aaaaahhhh!! SO much better!

You're KIDDING???

Came home to ORANGE spew splattered all over the bottom of our driveway yesterday. Some of the kids informed us it was spew. It was disgusting. I turned to Chris and said:

"You're KIDDING?!? SPEW?? Who spews in someone's driveway???"

Chris - "It happens"

Me - "Not if you're NOT using someone else's driveway as your OWN private walkway it doesn't!"

This morning as I checked the letterbox after dropping the boys off at school I noticed that I couldn't open the letterbox because the metal loop that the lock fits through had been bent upwards at probably a roughly 135 degree angle from it's previous/normal position.

I guess I should be glad the spew was on the drive.

Wardrobe Wednesday.....FAIL!

This is actually from last week when I attempted to take a photo of myself. A decent photo. Which actually ended up being several photos. None of which were flattering. Except perhaps this one. Maybe. It also led to the realisation that the red top I was wearing was an EXTREMELY unflattering top...

WHY.....

...are we REQUIRED to be able to back (reverse) around a corner?

Why, for those rare, yet very real and memorable moments in life when we come in contact with morons who decide it would be a GREAT idea to double park on a narrow little side street.
THAT is why.
Yup.

GIVE-AWAY on Anarashii!

I've just posted a give-away on Anarashii for a pair of knitted baby mitts - a current new design still technically "in the works" - I'm not one to beg for followers or anything, so all you need do to qualify is leave a comment and your name and I shall randomly draw the name of the winner. So if you, or someone you know, is pregnant, currently has a baby/young child, knows someone who is and is in desperate need of a gift - be sure to check it out and be in to win!

PS - just a reminder - you need to comment on the Give-away post on Anarashii - Best of luck! :D

'Spect you'll wanna see me Specs....

Ordered me some new glasses from Zennioptical, highly recommended to me by both Ange* and Mariah (who just happens to be Ange's sister).

Pros and Cons - Pros first - they are EXTREMELY cheap!! Also the postage is not out of this world. They arrived pretty quickly (mine arrived Friday).

Cons - it is an American site yet nowhere does it say clearly that it is or state that the prices are in USD - I always find this sort of thing a little annoying. Also because it is an American site there are problems when entering your details - I had to re-enter all my details at least 3 times because apparently they were "invalid" - what happens as a result of America-centric required address details.

All in all the pros majorly outweigh the cons however so I am still recommending this site to others - with the caveat that they will require a generous amount of PATIENCE in dealing with the site.

And so, without further ado (cos I know you all must just be fairly chaffing at the bit to see!*cough*) - me in me new specs:


*Here is the actual blog post where she raves about them :)

MORE encouraging incidents and comments from the "Murderhouse" aka Dental School

Yes - yet more encouraging incidents and comments from my visit to the Dental School yesterday....

incident: after they had finished I went to the toilet on my way out - fortunately for me! Doubly fortunately there are LARGE mirrors in the toilets by which I could quite easily see several smears of foreign white substance all over one side of my face - what? NOTHING?! Not one word? No - oh, you might want to get to a mirror and clean your face off? UN.BE.LIEV.ABLE.

Also, luckily as I peeked in the mirror I noticed that my mouth was full of blood. It was then that I remembered this particular comment (from the Tutor no less)

Comment: Hopefully that stops bleeding....

Not exactly brimming with confidence with comments like these guys!

Also I kept falling asleep again, they REALLY need to let me crochet or something while they're working on my teeth.
It does prove one thing though - it IS possible to doze off in an uncomfortable chair, with a sore neck, at the Dentist due to sheer boredom and lack of activity. It IS.

Are we on the same page here...?

Earlier at the Dental School....:

Dental Student: (upon completing work on my teeth) How are you feeling?
Me: My face is stinging.
Dental Student: Oh, it's just the cement - it can be a little irritating sometimes...
Me: My face is STINGING. Right HERE. And HERE. And along HEEEEEEERE.
Dental Student: (turning to assisting fellow dental student) Alcohol wipe.

At this point I'd like to point out that I thought - ALCOHOL wipe? I say my face is STINGING and your answer is to fix it with an ALCOHOL wipe??? Needless to say I had serious concerns about "curing" STINGING with an ALCOHOL wipe.

Assisting Dental Student wipes the stinging areas on my face that I had indicated.
Me: It's making it WORSE!!!!!

I wash my face off with water from a cup they pour for me. ALCOHOL wipe?!? WHAT were they THINKING?!?!!

What to do when Monsters descend upon you...

Me (to the kids, as I head outside to fetch wood for the fire in the dark of night): If I scream it's just the monsters eating me....(afterthought) run and shut the door!

TOUGH Talk - Mama style

Up till now we have always known Monk to be allergic to peanuts - we came to this logical conclusion once when he was very young when A chocolate CRUMB from a peanut slab made his face and neck puff up and also develop red whelps not unlike those caused by nettles. Fairly straightforward conclusion from there.

A couple of days ago Fuzz decided to give Monk a peanut MnM to see if he had grown out of his allergy. Monk ate it. Didn't like the taste. No reaction. GREAT!

Yesterday, Monk - who you will remember decided he didn't like the taste of peanuts - insisted that he wanted to try a WHOLE peanut slab - all to himself! Now I would argue that he was keen to try this, not to further test his seemingly disappearing allergy, but for the mere sheer quantity of chocolate to peanut ratio - but I may be wrong....however, he was not able to consume it without holding his nose - when questioned whether he liked it or not he responded testily with:
"I'm eating it, aren't I?"
I commented to him that if he was not able to eat it without holding his nose then he obviously didn't like it....And then the closer...because as a Mother, constantly making sure he avoided peanuts, and making sure that others knew he should till now, it occurred to me that just because he had eaten a peanut or two didn't necessarily mean he was over his allergy - it could just be evolving - he could be setting himself up for a big downfall. It occurred to me, that he might have a delayed reaction - I mentioned as much.

"What's a delayed reaction?" queried Monk, cluelessly.
Me:"It means you might die in an hour or two, instead of right away!"

What the...???

I just saw this featured in the Storque on Etsy.

What the...????

So my first thoughts in all honesty were - some sort of mistake...? This was perhaps meant to be featured on the Front Page of Regretsy?

Hmmmm....need I say more....



OR...Perhaps this is what happens when Cookie Monsters go bad?

Memorable Moments #2

I used to work at BONZ in Christchurch - which for those of you not in the know is a very upmarket "Souveneir" store - the type that thinks of themselves as SO fancy schmancy that they deign not to be referred to as a mere "Souveneir" store - and yet - that is what they are.
Especially with a name that is an acronym for "Best of New Zealand" - I mean - REALLY.

Anyway...
This one time I was helping out one of the Japanese Sales Assistant's with his American Customers - he didn't feel altogether confident with his English and asked me to help out - so I struck up a conversation with his customers while he sorted out the details of their purchases. It was easy to guess where they were from - they had Boston accents. And if I hadn't picked up on it from the accent surely I would have just as quickly picked it up from their straightforward no nonsense attitude - well, at least the husband's....

So, there I was chatting away with them, talking about their travels, where they were going to next and it turned out they were headed to Fiji next - well, wouldn't you know but Fiji had just recently had a military coup (it's getting to be a bit of a hobby really, isn't it?)...So I asked them if this was something that concerned them since they were travelling there next. The husband responded immediately,
"No. I have a GUN."

Awkward. What's that noise? Oh it's the sound of the conversation crashing and burning.

I mean really - what can you say to that?

Lesson learned

NEVER lick food off your fingers when you've been rinsing things with Dettol. No matter HOW delicious that morsel looks - DON'T do it!!!! Blecch.

(learned this, to my great misfortune, the other morning)

Memorable Moments

It's kinda vague now that I think back but I definitely remember slamming Fuzz's car door shut on my hand. I remember that it was weird. VERY weird. WEIRD? Yes, weird. Weird because I didn't really feel any pain - well maybe a bit - but not nearly as much as you'd think you know? Like when you get stung by a bee on your foot and at first you think it's a prickle, until you look and see it's actually a bee and then it's automatically a gazillion times more painful because you can clearly SEE that you've stood on a bee and not a prickle (I've had this happen to me). Yet I felt the door close on my hand, and I actually stood there for a good few minutes musing over how the door was shut on my hand, and how said door was flush with the car - and yet - unbelievably my hand was somehow in there squished betwixt car door and car body - HOW??? I also took a few moments to wonder why it wasn't particularly sore and how best to extricate my hand. OW.

So there you go - the first of many memorable moments.

And really....it didn't hurt all that bad - although possibly shock and endorphins mercifully kicked in and saved me. Who knows...

Deciphering Wombat-speak

"Ginja tisses ate meeee, mmmmmmm"

The Wombat's (aka Little J) attempt to tell his Grandma about some Ginger Kisses we jointly devoured.

Breakfast "Buddies"

When: Tuesday Morning
Scene: Table - Breakfast time

Monk: Everyone is having something different for breakfast except for me and Mum! Mum! You're having the exact same breakfast as ME! (that would be, porridge)
Me: No, I'm not having the same breakfast as you - I don't have milk with mine OR 5 different kinds of sugar!
Monk: *outraged scowl*

To be truthful he doesn't really have 5 different kinds of sugar on his porridge - he only has TWO.

BIKKURI

Yesterday, Fuzz surprised us all by joining in with us for Zumba.

It was certainly entertaining watching the other women's faces as they turned up and saw him participating.

Part way through I murmured to him,

"When we get home I'll bring up youtube so that I can show you a video of the ONLY other male in Dunedin, apart from you, that's doing Zumba."

Highlight of my day

I was taking my bowl and spoon to the kitchen to wash (after a delicious lunch of jelly sponge) when I had one of my frequent bouts of sheer brilliance - Monk had gone through to use the toilet and I knew he'd be back through the door in a sec - predictably neglecting to wash his hands. Soooo... instead of taking my bowl and spoon to the sink, I hid just by the back door beside the bathroom door, out of sight and waited - as soon as I heard the door open I yelled ,

"WASH YOUR HANDS!!!!"

at the top of my voice and then "sat back" and relished the subsequent fall-out.

It was the funniest thing. EVER.

(Yup, I'm STILL laughing).

Pirate eyes, they're watching youuuuu...

Okay - just to be clear - I do know that the song isn't Pirate eyes. I DO. Just my attempt at a catchy title.

Now. On with the story...

On our recent trip to Christchurch we took the older boys to a 1, 2 and 3 dollar shop at Eastgate so they could blow all their dosh on junky stuff - you know, the usual.

JJ Jonstarrrr got himself (amongst other things) a wee Pirate kit that had more in it than you'd have thought! An eye patch, pirate treasure/coins (of course), a nasty plasticy pirate bandana and a clip on pirate-y hoop earring.

Chris tried it on for laughs and to see if his beard made him look extra pirate-y. The result made me erupt in fits of uncontrollable laughter - see for yourself:

Chris/Fuzz: How does it look?

(or he may have said How do I look? or perhaps he meant do I look pirate-y? Suit a pirate-y hoop earring?)

Me: You look like you have a keyring in your ear.

Togs...Undies, Undies, UNDIES!!!

Scene - our lounge

When - This morning

Me (spying underpants STILL lying on the floor): Monk! Pick those (dirty) underpants up! Or I'll make you wear them when we go to the shop - and I don't mean on your bottom!"

Monk promptly dealt with the undies.

What if.....?

You consigned some items at a store that has continually had shady dealings with you in the past - a store that you now, choose to no longer consign your items with on account of said shady dealings....would you name and shame??

And what would it take?

I am currently ruminating on just such a situation - here is pretty much what I'm weighing up as I agonise over whether to name and shame or no...

* I know other innocent people are currently consigning with said store or will choose to in the future

* These people would perhaps choose NOT to consign with them if I spoke up

* Said store has an unspoken price "limit" for their store ie. they purport to be advocates of "Handmade" but in actuality they just want as cheap as poss so that they can in turn slog it off as cheaply as poss.

* On account of this said store has stolen ideas of mine and attempted to reproduce them - cheap and nasty attempted knock-offs!

* Said store has then lost all "motivation" to sell my items, removed them from their store without any discussion and stored them in their Garage.

* Said store did not inform me of their storing my items in their Garage for several months - in fact not until I repeatedly followed up and inquired after my items.

* Said store undercut me with their cheap nasty attempted knock-offs of my items or found others who would.

* Said store returned items damaged beyond repair, missing tags or key items eg. a Pattern from a Kit!!!

* Said store NEVER informed me of a damaged item or returned it for repair (a very simple task for me!) but instead "attempted" to "repair" and ended up pretty much destroying said item - I only found this out by way of a note in a box of my returned items.

* Said store did not inform me of missing item from Kit or missing tags or parts from other items or apologise for these things.

Sooooo.....what would you do?

Name and shame?

I feel quite ill just thinking on all of this - and here I was feeling relieved that all was over and done with this store and now I have to follow up on this missing pattern - who knows who has it now or if it's being copied/reproduced/sold. Just downright DESPICABLE if you ask me.

Should I chase them up on this missing pattern/incomplete kit?? Should I just let it go?

And IF I do let the pattern go.... should I still warn others about this store....?

In quite the conflicted quandry over this : (

Eclipse(d)...?

With the advent of Eclipse fast approaching I feel "moved" to share one of my fav "How it should have ended" clips. For those friends of mine who know my feelings about all things Twilight this shouldn't be a surprise. It's a goodie - enjoy -

This seriously cracks me up :D

A moment of your time....

Care to suggest a caption?

I have one in mind...even considering emailing this pic to Tuffy themselves.

How much will they give me? (aside from world-wide fame for my little one that is....? er well, perhaps "world-wide" fame in ....NZ?)

Oh and which picture is BEST?

Some Personal MJ Favourites

As I was driving home from dropping the boys off at school I heard on the radio that today is the anniversary of Michael Jackson's death, in memory of him they began playing MJ hits back to back from 9am. OH YEAH. It was close - I almost didn't make it out of the car...!

So I thought, appropriate surely to share some of my own favs - will they surprise you?

Well, firstly is this funky little number that until today I never knew was a cover of a Stevie Wonder song.
Definitely a winner in my books.

Funnily enough I was watching Rush Hour on Wednesday night when they played a short clip of this song that I had actually forgotten about! Shame on me.

Some other sure favs include (all from his Music and Me album) Cinderella stay awhile, We've got forever and All the things you are as well as others naturally.

For instance I was just remarking to Chris how this is probably one of the coolest scenes in a movie EVER. And naturally Thriller is what makes it.

There are many others that I certainly don't have time to name (let alone link to!), however I think it fitting to end with this mish-mash of MJ hits. Fairly impressive.

What are your favourites? Annnnd most importantly can you do this....?

The High Road ; )

Maybe I should pray for my neighbours.

j/k

Okay,....only a little....






Much thanks goes to Pearl, for putting me onto this guy - Thanks Pearl!

DONE!

Finished the new/replacement mittens for JJ - I messed up with one side of one of them. Also they don't look quite right somehow - the thumbs don't look right. Or something. Too small? Need to be longer? Or maybe just misplaced. Something to work on. Well here are the finished items. Will add a pick of them on the boy himself later.

One looks smaller than the other doesn't it. And no - I don't know why my text colour changes after I copy and paste a picture but it is VERY A.NNOY.IIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNG!!!

PESTO Pasta!!

I had a stab at making fresh basil and cashew pesto on Sunday night.

My thoughts? - one word only - YUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM.

Then...I couldn't wait to cook up some hot pasta and stir some through - which I did - for lunch. The very next day.

And I shared some with the little guy. Success! He loved it too! Huzzah!

He also kept wanting to look at all the pictures I took of him enjoying his PESTO Pasta! Has a ring to it, doesn't it?

Toasty!!

Finally got round to finishing off some Mittens I was supposedly making for JJ aka "Donts" as the wee man likes to call him. Mittens that I was procrastinating even though they take barely any time to make on account of them being for a child. That's why I like making accessories like this for children - take no time at all! And the sense of accomplishment.....GRAND.

Anyway, first time makin' 'em. No pattern. Guessin' and makin' it up as I go....not too shabby.

Next time - work out the 'kinks'. Might make some for myself even - after all they seem to keep your 'mitts' rather toasty.

...Did I startle you....?

Sorry! That rather loud, abrasive, slightly dorky, mocking laugh was in response to a request I saw from someone on Etsy for a knitted lace DRESS for $100.

ANNNNNND it was WHITE!!

Bahahahhahahhahahahhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Clap clap

Awesome day today, quite enjoyed interpreting for Mimu at church - although I don't know what I actually enjoyed the most - the interpreting itself OR astounding everyone with what I still know ten PLUS years later (muahaha - evil, glorying laugh).

Although I did feel a bit pet seal-ish near the end when Izaac kept wanting me to translate:

Scene: Me chatting with Mimu in Nihongo. Enter Izaac.

Izaac (looking at and talking to me) : There's gonna be choir for about 30 minutes - is that ok? (then) TRANSLATE!!!

Me: Arf, arf.

Okay.

I didn't actually say "Arf, arf".

You got me.

THAT ain't right!!!!!

Just got back home from the Monk's weekly Saturday morning soccer game - they won - but not without resistance! From the other team's coach! (who was reffing!)

What happened? Our team was about to TOTALLY get their second goal for the game when a boy from the other team - a boy who was on the sidelines, a boy who wasn't even playing - stepped in front of the goal and deflected the ball!!

What the?!??!!!

Then we (the parents) all start up -

"That was TOTALLY a goal!"

"GOAL Ref!"

" WHAA-AAAAAT?!?! He wasn't even playing?!?!!!"

"That TOTALLY would've gone in if not for the kid, who was subbed off!!!"

Ref verdict? NOT a goal!!!!

BUT he gave them a penalty shot. Which they pounded in there anyway - why not do the fair thing, why not just give them the goal and save yourself some time? I tell a lie! I got this mixed up with ANOTHER goal later in the game that should have been a goal but the ref, once again, reckoned wasn't - in the instance above the ref ruled it wasn't a goal. No penalty shot. NOTHING. (I'm sorry. Now I'm off to nomasu hari senbon).

SCOUNDREL.

There's only one phrase I can think of that perfectly describes my thoughts on this -

"THAT ain't RIIIIIIIGHT!!"

Chris Rock's "Presidential" catch phrase from "Head of State"

REALLY fitting here methinks. REALLY.

My boy (dark hair, red top) with his best mate (blonde, white sneaks, runnin' with the ball) at a tournament a few weeks back - which incidentally they won for their grade - wouldn't you know - this just happens to be the same team they played today! HA!

Quotes to live by.....

Just thought I'd share - mostly Disney ones - words to live by. really.

Life is like a straw it only sucks when you make it

"What made you decide to become a policeman-officer?" - Hot Fuzz

"I'm sorry Spleen, there's not enough beer in the WORLD" - The Bowler, Mystery Men

"But the animal is inside out....and it exploded" - Teb, Galaxy Quest

"Boy, I bet that must be frustrating" Dory, Finding Nemo

"I cannot heave me heart into my mouth" Cordelia, King Lear

"Brevity is the soul of wit" Polonius, Macbeth

"I like going to book stores and approaching the book clerk and saying - Hi, I'm looking for a book entitled 'How to deal with rejection without killing', can you help me?" - Some random, hilarious comedian I heard once

"Good feeling gone" - Dory, Finding Nemo

"Well that was INCREDIBLY eaaaaaasy" - from How "The Lord of the Rings" should have ended

"I'm not happy Bob. NOT happy." - The Incredibles

"Just, ah, whenever you get a 'fly so fast it reverses time itself' gadget on your belt - let me know" - Superman to Batman on How "Superman" should have ended

"He likes a peanut.....I like a peanut...." - Tantor, Tarzan

"Do you guys even READ the script?!!!" - Guy, Galaxy Quest

"I'm AMAZING. I'm Batman!!" - Dean, Supernatural

"Let's get out of here before one of those things kills Guy." - Gwen, Galaxy Quest

"Remember back in the day where Health and Safety was just called 'Common Sense'?" - A hilarious Aussie comedian whose name I don't recall

"No. I didn't do that." - Jermaine, Flight of the Conchords

Some of these I actually use regularly in everyday life - oh ho! - such as? you say unbelievingly....

"Boy, I bet that must be frustrating!" (Dory) - I use this ALOT. Love it.

What else?

"Well, that was INCREDIBLY eaaaaaaaaaasy," from "How The Lord of the Rings should have ended"

Usually when I'm surprised how easy or quickly something was achieved. Sometimes I forget where this quote is from and Chris likes to torture me until I remember.

"Good feeling GONE" - also another great one from Dory.

"I'm not happy Bob. NOT happy." - we actually used to have the Donts trained to say this when he was younger - we also had Monk trained when very young to say "A bargain!" when we cued him with "What do you get at The Warehouse?" and when we prompted him with "and a money back..." he would pipe up cheerfully "Guarantee!!"

Not so frequently I also like to say.....

"Do you guys even READ the script?!?!?!!" - Guy, Galaxy Quest - OR substitute words in appropriately such as recently with the crazed "neighbor" - does she even LIVE in her house?!?!!

"I'm AMAAAAAZING. I'm Batman." - Dean, Supernatural.

In fact....just this morning, I made a TOTALLY "Batman" worthy saving-catch. 'Twas AMAZING.