Me: YOU! ("pinning him to the spot" from across the room with my pointed finger. I pick up a cushion) THIS cushion (pointing at the cushion). YOUR name on it!! (I then throw the cushion at him in a typically awkward girly fashion). STOP!!! (with accompanying glare, to be interpreted as 'STOP doing all that naughty stuff NOW, cos Mummy SAYS SO!').
I continue my chat with Kate on the phone. Next thing you know JonSTAR has retrieved the thrown cushion from the floor and begins examining it intensely. Silence, while he thinks things over intensely then...
JonSTAR: Wait a minute!! This cushion doesn't have my name on it AT ALL!