Relatively speaking....

Tuesday afternoon Monk was scheduled for a Dental appointment. He was not keen. I had to think up some highly improbable yet reassuring scenario to get him out of the car.

Monk: I don't want to go. The Dentist hurts.

Me: It'll probably be FINE. The Dentist or Dental Nurse will probably say that your teeth are so perfectly and pristinely well kept (silent, inward scoffing) that she only needs to give them a quick polish - if that. So just get out of the car, and let's go. It'll be ok.

The REALITY.

Dental Nurse/Technician(?) : So Master M*, it appears that fillings from two of your teeth have fallen out and those teeth have become abscessed. (With a look in my direction) ...So unfortunately it seems like the only way to help those teeth is to have them....*pause* (and then she said the next word very carefully, with some degree of trepidation even) ...EX-TRACT-ED.
(All eyes on Monk to catch his reaction) : Phew!!! I thought I was going to have to have another filling!!!!

The Dental Nurse/Technician and I exchange knowing looks.

*Master M as opposed to Monk to show that the Dental Technician calls him by his actual name - pedantic, I know.

MORE encouraging incidents and comments from the "Murderhouse" aka Dental School

Yes - yet more encouraging incidents and comments from my visit to the Dental School yesterday....

incident: after they had finished I went to the toilet on my way out - fortunately for me! Doubly fortunately there are LARGE mirrors in the toilets by which I could quite easily see several smears of foreign white substance all over one side of my face - what? NOTHING?! Not one word? No - oh, you might want to get to a mirror and clean your face off? UN.BE.LIEV.ABLE.

Also, luckily as I peeked in the mirror I noticed that my mouth was full of blood. It was then that I remembered this particular comment (from the Tutor no less)

Comment: Hopefully that stops bleeding....

Not exactly brimming with confidence with comments like these guys!

Also I kept falling asleep again, they REALLY need to let me crochet or something while they're working on my teeth.
It does prove one thing though - it IS possible to doze off in an uncomfortable chair, with a sore neck, at the Dentist due to sheer boredom and lack of activity. It IS.

Aarrghhh! Me "Teethies"!?

Last Friday I had a dental appointment at the local Dental school (professional treatment for a fraction of the price - well ok, that fraction is still a fair bit....but). I have been assigned to a new dental student - you see last year I had a root canal (not for the faint hearted) - which in all honesty - probably worse than child birth (I've had THREE! - children that is). Sooooooo painful. So all that's left to be done is a crown on top of the tooth that had the root canal - to protect it and keep it strong. While we discussed this, my assigned student also pointed out that perhaps I might fancy some crowns for a few of my other teeth which had rather large visible fillings (he also explained that while they were in pristine condition now, in the future they may get wear and start to leak). We discussed colour too - gold crowns he said while stronger than porcelin "teeth coloured" crowns, are well, GOLD. I agreed - "I don't want to look like a pirate," I responded.

Highlights of Dental visit:

1. Both the dental student and I concurring on the whole undesirable-ness of looking like a pirate c/o Gold crowns.

2. "Teeth coloured" - I really like how the dental student referred to the porcelin crowns as "teeth coloured" - notice NOT "white". "Teeth coloured" I feel is a more realistic description of teeth colour and surely a more desirable shade than "so white they are BLUE" teeth that we see a lot these days c/o the whole whitening craze - want teeth that don't require a darkened room to glow? No thank you!

3. Both the Dental student and said student's tutor said that I had "beautifully cared for teeth" *BEAM*

I'm such a sucker.

Yes. I look like this EVERY day. I REALLY do.