PIN TO KONAI!

Attention "Friends"

2012-01-02T16:46:00.001-08:00

Attention "Friends" who give my children chewing/bubblegum,

Please note " " as if you insist on giving my children chewing/bubblegum you are NOT my friend. If you give my children chewing/bubblegum again despite my specific requests that you NOT I will find out. I will come to your house and I will re-deposit all your gifted chewing/bubblegum as my children would around your house....on your furniture, in your carpet, dropped in your wood basket, on your floor, stuck to the inside of cups the residue of which never to be removed......

You have been warned.

Wombat turns 4

2011-12-31T20:45:00.000-08:00

The morning of the birthday....

Me: What day is it today Wombat?

Wombat: Tuesday!!

Me: Well, no....but what day is it today.....?

Wombat: Friday!!

...........

He's a smart one.

Dinner talk

2011-12-11T12:19:00.000-08:00

Whilst sitting round at the dinner table the other night the conversation went thus:

Monk: Mum, have you ever broke any of your bones?

Me: No. NEVER.

Bear: What about your legs?

Exchanged looks with Monk. Copious hearty chuckling.

When I am a growed up ; )

2011-11-08T02:06:00.000-08:00

Earlier today....

Me: Wombat, what are you going to be when you grow up and you're a big boy like your Daddy?

Wombat: A man.

Wombat is 3yrs old.

The End.

A miracle on the way home from school...

2011-10-26T22:19:00.000-07:00

Driving home from school Monk turned to me and said:

"Mum - what year were you born?"

Me - "76."

Monk - "18 or 19?"

And there's your miracle! Approx. 3 hrs later and the boy is STILL alive.

Easy Peasy Baked "Tortilla" chips

2011-10-18T05:11:00.000-07:00

Just in case the pictures don't suffice.

1. Pre-heat oven to 180 Celsius.

2. Buy a pkt of Roti* - 6 to a pkt. And yes I know that they are not technically tortillas but they're pretty much the same thing and they're the best that I've used thus far (I've tried at least two other brands and types of tortillas)

3. Put your Roti on a large plate. Rub each Roti with oil - front and back. Stack the Roti and cut into 8ths.

4. Arrange Roti chips on a tray (no need for greasing the tray as they're already oiled!). Try not to let them overlap - you will no doubt have to do at least two (depending on the size of your tray) or more tray-fuls.

5. Bake for 6 mins - no turning, nothing. If they are not quite golden try for a minute or so longer till they reach a desired colour - but be careful because they can burn very quickly and very easily!

6. Remove your chips from the tray and load it up with another batch for baking - repeat as necessary till all your chips are baked.

THAT easy!

You can add seasonings as you wish but we always just prefer to have them plain. And THAT is pretty much my fav most convenient snack food - yum, arguably healthy, not to mention super quick and dead easy to make.

Also great to make up on short notice say if you have a pkt or two lying around in your freezer for unexpected guests/occasions - handy!

*Just thought I should add that I am in NZ and thus necessarily have used NZ brands or at least brands and items that are available in NZ to make these chips - if you're outside of NZ you may or may not be able to get the same things - I would suggest experimenting with tortillas from a few different brands to see what works for you - in my opinion smaller (roti) tortillas are the best to use - and you still get heaps of chips! I tried using large Old El Paso ones but they stuck together and were flakey. I also tried using large Wholemeal Tortillas - these needed to be baked for longer and just didn't taste as nice. OR if you make your own - even better! That's what I need to learn to do :D

I do not think it means what you think it mondegreens..... ; )

2011-10-18T05:02:00.000-07:00

I had asked Wombat to ask Daddy to brush his teeth (it is one of the things that I have drilled into - or at least tried to drill into my boys and Wombat is now convinced that he is incapable of retiring to bed without first having his teeth brushed).

Chris was grumpy because he wanted the boys to hurry up and go to bed.

Wombat attempted to cower behind my legs as he said "Daddy is very angry and I am scared! I want you to come and brush my teeth!"

I walked through to the bathroom with Wombat and said, "Daddy is not angry - SEE, he is not angry. He is just tricking! He is a tricker!"

Wombat promptly attempted to mimic me and pointing at his Daddy exclaimed with gusto -

"You are a CHICKEN!!"

Especially for my mondegreen luvin' friend : )

Twofer

2011-09-20T03:11:00.000-07:00

Initially I when this seedling sprouted I optimistically jumped to the conclusion that it was corn. In fact I couldn't remember WHAT I had planted but as it progressed I was certain it wasn't corn - or at least, I was uncertain that it was corn. As it grew some more I could see that there were in fact TWO seedlings. Were they peas? Had I planted one and then foolishly forgetting I had already planted something in the pottle then planted another? As it turned out the seedlings were peas - they were just taking their time.

Also....

And...

Two plants = one seed. Twins. Futago. Twofer. Especially for you Ange.

Funnies at Church

2011-09-17T21:02:00.001-07:00

I went looking for our youngest and walked back into the chapel proper just in time to hear an amusing story being told about Sally and Jonny - Sally and Jonny were siblings it seems who were visiting their grandparents. Sally just so happened to witness Jonny accidentally killing one of their grandparents' ducks. The boy was petrified and thinking the accident had gone unwitnessed hid the duck in the woodpile. For several weeks Sally held the dead duck over him - "volunteering" Jonny for her share of the chores - each time with a fierce reminder whisper "Remember the duck!"

After 2-3 weeks of this Jonny couldn't take it any longer and caved, confessing to their grandmother and apologising. She confessed that she had also seen the event unfold, had already forgiven him and was just curious to see how long he would allow his sister to use him as a slave.

"There are a few lessons we can learn from this story," the Sister who was sharing the story said.

Me to Chris: Extortion is EFFECTIVE!

Chris to Me: DON'T marry Sally!

Only I don't think that's quite what she was going for.

Bereft Pantry

2011-09-14T02:43:00.000-07:00

So I had intended to do a top 5 or so cheap and easy snacks BUT I decided a while ago when we had those ginormous snow falls that perhaps cheap and easy meals with few ingredients or meals that could be easily and quickly made with items already in your pantry, kitchen cupboards and fridge might be appreciated - so, here goes (I know I put "bereft" pantry but I have a pretty well stocked "pantry" and I consequently presume that others do too so sorry if I over assume here!)

Tuna stirfry - or simply "tuna pasta" as we've come to call it - what you need:

2 cans of tuna in OIL (I think it is 125gms), Pasta (I like to use spirals - you can also use rice), onions - 1 or 2 depending on size and how much you like onions I guess, 2 large tomatoes, 2 eggs - and then the "givens" - a large pot, a medium sized pot, a can opener, salt, water, spatula/stirrer, paring knife, rubbish bag.

Method: Fill med. pot with water, add salt. Leave to come to the boil. Drain oil from tuna tins into large pot and turn on the heat. Chop onions while oil heats - add to pot and saute. Chop tomatoes and add when onions are soft, season with salt and leave to simmer, stirring occasionally. Add pasta to boiling water, tipping out any excess. Bring pasta to boil, turn down heat and set timer for 6 mins - stir occasionally. Take pasta off heat, stir, place lid on tightly and leave off element - the steam should cook any pasta that is not quite done yet. Drain. Add Tuna to onion and tomato mixture and simmer. When mixture has reduced a little add cooked pasta and stir well. Crack in two eggs and stir through.

The "original" version of this recipe used rice. I have found that the rice absorbs the oil more and that's not so great but still yum! Also pasta is quicker/easier to cook than rice.

You can have this all by itself - it's addictive! But it's nice to have something green/salad-y to break it up so steamed broccoli or salad or both. I also like to add sprouts to my tuna pasta when it's done or stir through torn spinach/silverbeet leaves.

Samosa filling - aka "Curried Beans"

One night I was making dinner from an Alison Holst recipe. I love samosas but making the pastry and frying them is TEDIOUS. So I thought why not just make and eat the FILLING - and then I'm not quite sure why but I added baked beans - surprisingly YUM!

You'll need: 3 or 4 potatoes - peeled, chopped into chunky pieces and cooked, oil, onions, ground coriander, cumin, garam masala and curry powder, sugar, salt, 1 cup frozen peas, lemon juice, water, 2 cans baked beans, cooked rice.

Method: Rinse your rice and get it cooking. Chop onions and saute in 1 Tbsp oil. Add all the spices and seasonings and potatoes - 1 tsp of ea except for Curry powder - 2 tsp Curry powder - recipe says you can sub in Curry powder for any of the spices you don't have. Add frozen peas, 1/4 cup water and lemon juice (supposed to be juice of one lemon - I just squirt some in generously). When peas are soft add baked beans and stir through - heat through. Serve on rice. I've also added chopped cooked carrots - to add colour! I know the baked beans sounds odd - but it's fine! REALLY. Oh and the beans and rice wrapped up in wholemeal tortillas - YUM!!

Simply dubbed "Bean soup" by us - Such a hearty mouth-watering soup! (by Simon and Alison Holst - 20min meal cook book)

You'll need: Can of 4 bean mix, Can of red kidney beans, can whole tomatoes, olive oil, onions, garlic, ham (optional), thyme, salt, pepper, bay leaves, chicken stock, water, macaroni, pesto.

Method: Heat 2 Tbsp Olive Oil in a pot, quarter and slice med. onion, chop garlic (chop and add ham if wanted - the original says Bacon but I always get ham - it's arguably cheaper and you can get a few slices at the Deli as opposed to an entire pkt - handy!) - add and saute. Add 2 bay leaves, 1/4 tsp thyme and chillies or 1/2 tsp dry chilli (I've never used chillies/chilli) and cook for 1 min longer. Add cans of beans and tomatoes, 4 cups of water and chicken stock powder (4 tsps), bring to boil add 1 cup macaroni - boil gently for 10-12mins. Season with salt and black pepper. I love this with basil pesto I've made myself. YUM. Of course it's also delish as is.

Refried Beans - another Alison Holst recipe. Can't get enough of it - done in mere minutes!

You'll need: Can Red Kidney Beans, Oil, Onion, Garlic, Green Capsicum, Salt, Sugar, Oregano, Cumin, Chilli powder, Tomato paste - I also often use dried Red Kidney Beans which I soak and cook myself. I use the "dried beans yield twice their volume cooked" method to determine how much beans to cook : ) - ask me about soaking and cooking times if you're keen to cook dried beans.

Method: Chop onion and garlic finely and saute in 1 Tbsp oil. Add chopped green capsicum, salt sugar and spices when onion is soft and clear - 1/2 tsp for everything except for cumin (1 tsp cumin). When capsicum softens drain beans (but keep juices in case mixture is too dry) and add them and also 1 Tbsp tomato paste. Make sure you use just plain unseasoned kidney beans - this is hot enough already! Heat mixture through and then mash. I like to eat this with baked tortilla chips, a teensy bit of grated cheese and plain easiyo yoghurt subs for sour cream. YUMMO.

Ham and Egg Pie - only it's more than just HAM and EGG.

You'll need: pre-rolled puff pastry sheets - prob 2, greased oblong shaped casserole dish, salt, water, potatoes and carrots peeled and chopped, 5 or 6 eggs, cheese, onions, ham, mushrooms -lil bit of milk for glaze.

Method: Pre-heat oven 150-200 C. Season water - get your potatoes and carrots cooking. Chop onions and ham - saute in a little butter/spread. Place one pastry sheet in bottom of greased dish - cut to shape. Place potatoes and carrots evenly on top of pastry sheet, sprinkle onion and ham over top, quarter mushrooms and scatter them over the onion and ham, beat eggs and pour over other ingredients, grate cheese over top. Place other pastry sheet on top of pie. Slice some vents in top, glaze with milk and Bake! The pie is done when the pastry is golden and the eggs are cooked!

You may have noticed that I have neglected to number these meals - this is because I can't decide which ones are quicker/easier or have the least ingredients. Try them and make your own judgement!

Next time - quick, easy and cheap meals with few ingredients but with recipes that presume you have meat : )

Hypothetical Doctor's visit

2011-09-05T16:15:00.001-07:00

I have laryngitis.

BUT my throat is not sore - yay! I just have no voice - it is totally BEYOND Kathleen Turner or Carly Simons stage (showing my age!)

But I'm fine otherwise so I'm not planning on visiting the doctor. Why bother? I know what's wrong with me. I can't do anything about it. What can the doctor tell me that I don't already know? I'm not paying to be told what is CLEARLY obvious.

Here's how I imagine my hypothetical "conversation" (conversation is in " " because - hello - I have no voice!) going down with the Dr if I decided to throw away my money on a no brainer. (Go ahead and imagine me using a thickly sardonic tone or if not a tone - cos I have no voice - a thickly sardonic air about me)

Dr: You have Laryngitis.

Me: I figured that.

Dr: Your throat doesn't appear to be inflamed.

Me: REALLY??

Dr: You should try not to speak.

Me: With my kids??

Dr: You really need to rest your voice.

Me: No kidding.

Dr: Here's your bill for me telling you what was already blindingly obvious.

Me: Thanks for nothing. I could've bought a bunch of Skor bars with that.

Okaaaay, so that last Dr's comment was TOTALLY imagined. No Dr says that sort of thing - ALOUD - RIGHT???

Today's internal monologue...

2011-08-27T18:44:00.000-07:00

Me: Self! AWESOME hair day Self!

Me: Why thank you.

Me: You're welcome.

Unfortunately, not so great on the fashion front. Because ironing frilled shirts suck!

5 fav top cost-cutting tips

2011-08-10T22:40:00.001-07:00

1. You know what I used to think was stupid? Pre-planning meals for the week. What do I do now, religiously even? Pre-plan meals for the week. Then I revise what I'll need to make those meals and that's what I buy or if I have what I need already but my "reserves" are getting low then I'll re-stock the ingredients I use. Apart from staple fresh fruit and vege (and non-edible necessities - ablutions and such) I don't buy much else. I save any left over money for fruit, vege and milk top-ups through out the week or I buy something garden related - seeds, compost, herbs, trees, pots OR I carry it over to the next week. Just decide NOT to buy non-necessities. Do you need it to survive? No? Then DON'T get it! Treat foods are not treat foods if you get them ALL. THE. TIME. I also put a decent amount weekly into Christmas Club.

2. Like your yoghurt but find it too costly? Buy a yoghurt maker - we have an Easiyo yoghurt maker. The neat thing about this is that you can pretty much use the yoghurt mixes indiscriminately regardless of brand - I have used hansells yoghurt mix before (at least I think it was hansells) so you can get yoghurt for even cheaper if the brand you usually use isn't on special! And it means you have a wider array of flavours at your disposal. Or you can just not care and get the same brand as your yoghurt maker like me. Although I think Hansells has a creamier plain yoghurt. Fav flavoured yoghurt at the mo is Easiyo Forest Fruits - flavourful and CREAMY!!! If you're worried about your children liking/not liking it all my boys (3, 7 and 9) love it.*

3. Plus side of making your own yoghurt - you can use plain yoghurt in place of SO many things like sour cream or instead of milk in your baking/cooking - although I'd advise against using it instead of milk in mashed potatoes - blechhh. May I say though that it makes Ange's microwave mug cake heavenly!

4. Stock up! Aside from the fact that my church encourages its members to store food and necessities for unforeseen emergencies (ie. natural disasters as well as financial ones!) I'm just a very practical person and as such I think it's pretty hard to deny the wisdom in stocking up on food items that you use a lot and that also store well. For instance - a few benefits that I find are:

*I can pretty much bake anything on a whim.

*If someone needs a meal or a pick-me-up treat I can whip something up at pretty short notice without too much stress.

*Thanks to our large chest freezer which I fill with bread (ok not entirely, but we have enough that if I can't get any for any reason we can survive a week or so without re-stocking) it means in the holidays when everyone's buying up all the sandwich slice loaves I'm sweet.

*We always have toasted sammy/toastie pie fillings.

5. Cheese is expensive! When you need to grate cheese for a dish cut off a chunk to grate and only use that - don't hold and grate the whole block. This way you'll only grate the chunk you cut off (well, theoretically anyway). Also choose the side with the smaller/smallest holes to grate your cheese - it'll give you more cheese volume for less. Try and take notice of how big a chunk you cut off so you know how much you need for next time - if you cut too much off then cut a smaller chunk next time. When making toastie pies - slice cheese as thinly as possible - less mess when making and to clean up after and also thick bits of melted cheese are just ick - it's not just me, right? You seriously don't need to use THAT much cheese. When you make cheesy dishes like lasagne and it requires cheese layers as well as cheese on top - really skimp on the cheese on the top. Cheese on the top should be more like a garnish - and a stingy garnish at that. Besides - it's not like it's going to be lacking in cheese is it?

*Of course they also love apples, carrots, gherkins......

O be wise...

2011-08-07T02:16:00.000-07:00

Bear was playing Chess on the laptop against the computer when he exclaimed in complete surprise:

"He didn't take my pawn!"

(he of course, meaning the computer)

Me:"Who didn't?"

Bear: "The computer. He could've taken my pawn BUT he didn't!" (apparently incredulous)

Me: "Well, just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should. Just because you can do something, doesn't mean it's always wise to. For instance, just because we can eat something, doesn't mean that it is wise to do so. Poison can be eaten. We can eat poison - but then it will kill us! Should we eat poison just because it can be eaten?"

Bear:"NO!" (emphatically)

Me: So just because we can do something, doesn't mean we should, see?"

Why Children should pick their toys up off the floor

2011-07-22T20:21:00.000-07:00

Just about impaled my right palm on a Bey Blade this morning. Yeeeouchhhhh!! I AM SERIOUS. How ridiculous is THAT?!

After I stopped wailing and clutching my injured hand however I found I could still do my morning set of pushups. Yay!

My palm is still stinging intermittently when I least expect it. Yup, it's the holidays.

At least it's "takin' my mind off all that pain"* - toothache brought on by hot food and drink. It's Winter here btw - Bummer, eh?

*Ok, ok - it's a paraphrase - name that movie!!

Insight into the mind of The Monk

2011-07-16T04:30:00.000-07:00

The other morning Wombat was unwell. BUT diligent - that 3yr old gorgeousness ran with great desperation from his room, through the free-flow lounge, dining area, through the kitchen, right through to the bathroom where he shrieked for a bucket all so he could be sick in it! Gem.

Later as we cuddled in "the big bed" I asked him. "Did you spew in your bed?"

Wombat: No.

Me: You're AWESOME.

Wombat: Yes I am.

However a few minutes later he power chucked all over himself, me, our pillows and some of the bed requiring that I strip the bed and shower myself and the wombat-ty cherub.

After seeing to all this cleaning, wiping and soaking - all before school I might add - The Monk expressed some frustration about when we might be heading out to school to drop off him and Bear.

I responded "Wellllll, what do you still have to do to get ready?"

Ever the charmer Monk responded "Uh, I need to poo in my pants."

Me (without so much as an eye twitch) "Well, you better get pooing then - you wouldn't want to hold us up!"

And that was THAT.

Sneak peek!

2011-07-10T14:31:00.000-07:00

So here's a sneak peek at some of the new items I recently designed and made to enter into the Spotlight competition that closes at the end of this month - I think I have about 5 possible entries, and may squeeze some more in - it's the temptation to just keep designing and making things instead of finishing off the paper work etc for the entries I have completed that is the problem! Now just to photograph! Anyway here is a sneak peek at the main entry - it's knit AND crochet dress top - but I'm being coy and only letting all see a smidgeon!

Pssssst! I LOVE honeycomb cables! ; )

I've made 3 pairs of new knit cuffs all in different colours - I'm just a bit iraira (frustrated) about the fact that this new lattice stitch I just learnt to knit doesn't show up very well! Any tips? It's not really very defined/clear examining it in person either sadly - and I've made it in two very different colours : (

This is my attempt to try and give you a closer, clearer image of the knit lattice pattern. Yeah - not working is it? Sighhhhhhhhhh.

I also tried making one design that was just - let's face it - plain UGLY. So I canned it. 5/6 not too shabby though methinks.

Wish me luck and stay tuned to see what I finally decide to enter!

Status report

2011-06-29T04:59:00.000-07:00

Several pairs of mini mitts made - check.

Yet to attach buttons to said mini mitts.

Ami Ana debuting said mini mitts at Moxie Market at the Perc this Friday!!

Pics to come.

Feeling frustrated...

2011-06-24T17:52:00.000-07:00

Upside:

Good pictures. Great pictures even.

Downside:

Doesn't really show/show-off the hat and its detail.

Boo.

Polite ...to a fault.

2011-06-24T16:32:00.000-07:00

Yesterday...

Wombat: You have a BIG bottom.

Me: THANKS (ripe with sarcasm)

Wombat: You're welcome.

Good thing he's cute.

Ami Ana's going MINI!!

2011-06-23T23:32:00.000-07:00

So I've decided it's time for Ami Ana to go mini - that is to make some of Ami Ana's most popular items in mini or toddler/childrens size - are you excited?!?

Before you get too excited I should preface this by saying that they are I'm afraid all "girls" items - sorry! Girls are just easy and fun to make fashion and fashion accessories for. And I'm a girl. At least, Wombat frequently tells me that I am. Sorry.

Anyway...this leads to the reason why I am posting about this on this blog rather than on Anarashii - which I surmise is just what you're wondering about. I have a confession - I need your help! And I mean "your" as in I need your help my fellow kiwi bloggy friends : D (sorry to those outside of NZ!! - it's just it's costly to post outside of NZ when funds are low - but not to say that this could change). So - what do I need your help with? Sadly this proves to be not particularly helpful when it comes to designing items for female youngins ; ) - this is where you lovely friends come in! I'm seeking your assistance so that I can better gauge size and also to confirm that I'm getting my size "guesses" right - so help me out and that's right - you read right - you get FREE stuff!! One other thing, if you're ok with it, it would be extremely helpful if you could also snap some pix for me with your dear wee girls modelling what every Ami Ana freebie you're lucky enough to receive - I will not post pix without your approval and naturally I will not name names (unless you want me to) but I will post a link to your blog, your site - whatever you prefer. Interested? Leave me a comment and I'll get in touch with you - and make sure you have a contact email currently saved on your profile or I won't be able to contact you! : (

One more thing - I am well aware of how wool can aggravate sensitive skin and am constantly looking at or searching out soft synthetics or other cost effective natural yarns that pill less than others - have you found something that you think is great? Let me know! (unless it's feather yarn...uh, cos then I don't want to know) - with the exception of feather yarn, which I have an anaphylactic aversion to, I'm very keen to hear about other options : )

So without further ado here are a few of the items that I'm keen to make "minis" of - do you have Ami Ana favs you'd love to see mini versions of? What are they? Let me know! :D

Also possibly these....

What do you think?

Something new at Ami Ana...

2011-06-23T20:51:00.000-07:00

Made these new cuffs the other night.

Still not sure about them - thoughts anyone?

Not the best, but I took some more pix - see below!

Maybe they'll grow on me....

Angey Pangey's Cornbread and candid picture snapping attempts

2011-06-19T02:54:00.000-07:00

Made Ange's Cornbread tonight as an accompaniment to soup. Perrrrrfect. Wombat LOVED it. Gobbled it up and had seconds. With honey even. What follows are some pictures I snapped of him - intended to be candid shots of him in the throes of enjoying the bread - alas. Well - the pictures tell it all really.

I think this is probably most accurately described as the "overkill" smile. Or perhaps the "My Mummy says I have to enjoy this bread so I'm enjoying it dammit!"

He's actually chewing it here - as opposed to pursing his lips for a kiss or speaking French that is.

This is about the most candid shot I got of him ALL night. Yup.

He may be built like a Wombat but he watched me like a Hawk he did. And ears like a bat! - listening for the sound of the camera being turned on!! I thought I had caught him with this one but no! - he was too fast for me and managed to somehow sneak in a smile even as he gobbled.

Descriptive dilemma

2011-06-16T14:33:00.000-07:00

What do I go with here for these....? I mean technically it is A carrot - right? But what do I say - how do you like our carrot? OR how do you like our BUNCH of carrotS? OR How do you like our mutant carrot/s?

....or perhaps,... long stabby thing/s .......?

Er, Fionna?

Bless

2011-06-16T14:20:00.000-07:00

This morning when I told Wombat "Mummy's feeling a little sick."

He immediately responded, "Do you want my bucket?"

Heart-melter.

That expectant look...

2011-06-05T16:21:00.000-07:00

We were at Monk's soccer game Saturday morning and I was watching (and helping) Wombat and his friend clamber up and down a tree at the edge of the field. Wombat very quickly got the hang of climbing up and down on the lowest branch, yet soon the inevitable happened and slipping (from climbing down?), he fell the short distance to the ground landing on his back in the grass.

I scooped the crying Wombat up in my arms and attempted to ascertain where the injury(ies) were so that I could - in the regular motherly fashion - kiss them better. I thought that perhaps he had hit his head. But no.

It was soon immediately obvious what his main concern was - he stuck out his tongue, still crying, to reveal 2 or 3 little blood dots along one side and tearily said that he had bit his tongue (or at least that's what I think he said)

Then transfixing me with an expectant look, he continued to look at me steadily, with his tongue still protruding....waiting...

Yeaaaaah, NAH.

Dodgy.

I gave him a hug. And a pat. You'll get over it son.

Relatively speaking....

2011-06-03T21:14:00.000-07:00

Tuesday afternoon Monk was scheduled for a Dental appointment. He was not keen. I had to think up some highly improbable yet reassuring scenario to get him out of the car.

Monk: I don't want to go. The Dentist hurts.

Me: It'll probably be FINE. The Dentist or Dental Nurse will probably say that your teeth are so perfectly and pristinely well kept (silent, inward scoffing) that she only needs to give them a quick polish - if that. So just get out of the car, and let's go. It'll be ok.

The REALITY.

Dental Nurse/Technician(?) : So Master M*, it appears that fillings from two of your teeth have fallen out and those teeth have become abscessed. (With a look in my direction) ...So unfortunately it seems like the only way to help those teeth is to have them....*pause* (and then she said the next word very carefully, with some degree of trepidation even) ...EX-TRACT-ED.
(All eyes on Monk to catch his reaction) : Phew!!! I thought I was going to have to have another filling!!!!

The Dental Nurse/Technician and I exchange knowing looks.

*Master M as opposed to Monk to show that the Dental Technician calls him by his actual name - pedantic, I know.

Lightbulb moment

2011-06-02T03:08:00.000-07:00

Bear: Mum, which is your towel and which is the bath mat?

Me: Well, that explains A LOT.

BEAR-ly relevant

2011-05-25T17:39:00.000-07:00

Bear has had a dead wiggly tooth for some time now - top centre front - one of the "biguns". We have tried various things to get it out - even suggesting he get a paper towel and try to pull it out himself - which he did try a couple of times with fierce determination! It's been pretty stubborn.

Anyway, last night whilst we were out (Fuzz and I that is) at a farewell party for a friend Monk texted Fuzz to let us know that Bear's tooth had finally fallen out - huzzah!!

So this morning I call Bear over and attempted to find out how his tooth had come out in the end, stubborn as it was....

Me: So Bear, how did your tooth fall out last night?

Bear: Mum....Monk was watching Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix last night! (said as if it was particularly significant)

Meanwhile, I am left puzzling over the relevance of this statement which is apparently part of the same conversation that I initiated when I asked how his tooth fell out - no other further explanation however.

After, uttering an internal Huh to myself I say:

Me: So uh, your tooth was SO frightened from watching this (ie. the movie), that that made it fall out....?!!

snort from Fuzz (also in the room).

Pause.

I look up.

Bear is gone.

Apparently he felt his response was more than sufficient.

"I do not think it means what you think it means....."

2011-05-22T15:47:00.000-07:00

Perhaps my first mistake was thinking that my young child actually appreciated something I had done for him - I mean who wouldn't appreciate hot porridge with brown sugar and sprinkled liberally with cinnamon and a dash of milk? RIGHT??

But yes, perhaps I was jumping the gun - perhaps, when I asked wombat - "Did you enjoy your porridge?"

and he answered rather enthusiastically "YES!" - that should have sent up a red flag.

A red flag for what? you ask......a red flag that:

"I've finished my porridge, Mummy!" actually meant "I've finished.....smearing my porridge all over the table, chair and floor!"

Snarl.

What crafty people do when they're bored...

2011-05-15T01:09:00.000-07:00

....casually knit up a wallet/cover/snuggie (whatever you wanna call it - I prefer wallet - sounds sleaker - or at least as sleak-sounding as a knit accessory can be) for my newly gifted smart phone whilst watching Bones and Fringe...

And sew on a button securely (apparently the way I was taught to sew on buttons is the way professional tailors sew buttons).

Kinda sad really - isn't it?

In fact my only real redeeming factor in all this is a minute instance of lazy indulgence by way of not knitting a button hole - that's right - there are no button holes or at least I didn't need to purposely knit any into the pattern as the twists in cable knits naturally create holes in the knitted fabric.

And then the next morning I was fishing around in my bag and found a cream egg - score! Yes albeit it was wrapped in a hankie (used? unused? who knows...) and the wrapper was missing in parts..... and it was a bit sticky....probably belonged to one of the boys....who may or may not have started eating it (ie. read as "drooled on" - hence the stickiness?) but we're focusing on the positive here - hence - cream egg - wooooo! SCORE!!

The type of Mother I am

2011-05-07T19:11:00.000-07:00

I like to think that I am a fairly particular type of Mother. I am a "no-sugar coating" Mother. I tell it like it is.

For instance, one night Monk (the oldest) came to me and in an attempt to delay going to bed he announced, holding his finger aloft, that he could not go to bed because something was wrong with his finger. He then proceeded to elaborate on this a little by repeating several times rather earnestly that something (he wasn't quite sure what) was wrong with his finger. He then, insisting something was wrong with it, proffered it to me asking if I could see just exactly what was wrong with it. I peered at said proffered finger and responded "Yes. It's not in bed."

Of course,...one might argue that this is a fairly accurate description for the attitude with which I approach life in general - not just mothering.

For instance, when my Dad just last night objected to a current movie premise as it was explained in a review - that of the movie Source Code - that is that a soldier is sent back in time to retrieve info, but there's a catch - he only has 8mins each time he travels to gather intel. On hearing this my Father cried aloud "Oh! That's just UNREALISTIC!!"*
Inwardly I responded, "Uh what? As er, opposed to say.....time travel.....?!?"

PS.
We LOVED the movie. Next step up from Minority Report and PayCheque I thought. Can't believe the tv3 reviewer gave it ONLY 3.5 out of 5 stars!!! LUDICROUS.

*Dad thought the concept of someone only having 8mins to gather info was unrealistic. REALLLLLLLY Dad??? You're gonna pick holes in a scifi plot based on what is feasible....??

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY EVERYONE!!!!

5 Little known facts about MOI

2010-12-15T23:57:00.000-08:00

1. I started out my "acting career" as a dancing bunny in our Primary School Production of "Winnie the Pooh".

2. I worked for the Anglican Church one Summer - in the Christchurch Cathedral to be exact.

3. Will(iam) Mariner, whom Mariner's Cave in Tonga is named after, is my Great, Great, Great, Great Grandfather (give or take a "Great").

4. Somewhere in Taiwan there is an icecream poster(s) with me on it! (it was an SJS job)

5. Pink bikkies with hundreds and thousands were my FAV bikkies as a child.

The big PC and the Santa Dilemma (not what you'd expect)

2010-12-14T02:02:00.000-08:00

Well, ......this is going to be quite the different blog from what it was going to be. What was it going to be?

Well, ...my friend recently posted on her blog about what I shall refer to as the Santa Dilemma. This whole idea that "lying" to our children about Santa - a fictional character, invented by Coca Cola for Commercial and Capitalistic gain, and "based" on a fairytale and lore embellished Saint Nick - will have such a drastic effect on their lives that it will cause them to lose all faith in us and consequently, potentially lose faith in their faith.

Well

This was going to be a post all about how I considered this had all come about thanks to the large all-encompassing shadow of PC - namely Political Correctness - it's got everyone, particularly parents, running scared. It was going to mention how perfectly sound moral stories like Red Riding Hood have been irreparably and heinously ruined by the effects of PC - as in the instance where I saw a version that belonged to my niece, several years ago now, wherein Red and her Granny were rescued from the Wolf by the Woodsman (that much is the same at least) but instead of the Woodsman logically and realistically chasing off or killing the Wolf for their own safety - he is instead let go, albeit after a HARSH reprimand by the Woodsman. SERIOUSLY??

Well, it was going to be about that.

It was also going to be about such unbelievable things as iconic childrens' characters altered beyond belief such as Cookie Monster now eating fruits and veges and cookies only being a "sometimes" food. He is a COOKIE MONSTER. For goodness sake!

Also apparently The Count (also from Sesame St) no longer laughs after he counts - apparently it was too scary for some children so they cut that out. REALLLLLY??

Well, it was going to be about all of that. It was. And how I believed that Santa had just become really another victim of PC Paranoia. It was at least until I saw this picture - Bear and his class and the rest of the Junior School had a whole fun day out today as part of the 4th to last day of school. As part of this they went to Cadbury World and Bear had THIS picture taken with Santa. DODGY Santa I call him. Don't you think?

Bear and Dodgy Santa - look at that Dodgy look on his face!

Here are my comments as Fuzz perused the picture:

Me: That Santa looks DODGY!! DODGY Santa! What is that up with that DODGY Santa sitting next to OUR Bear with his hand near his BOTTOM! Look at that DODGY look on his face!! And is that a BED they're sitting on?!?!!!

Fuzz shakes with silent laughter as he peruses and I continue to comment.

Me: Do they do a CHECK on these Santas before they let them sit there ALL DAY and have pictures with LITTLE kids sitting on their knee?? I mean LOOK at him! DODGY Santa!

Seriously disturbing - NO child should have a Christmas where THIS Santa is included. If EVER there were a reason NOT to include Santa in Christmas this picture would be the CAMPAIGN POSTER!

It's torches and pitchforks time...

2010-12-09T19:28:00.000-08:00

I'll let the pictures and videos speak for themselves - but also add some info not shown in photo form:
Picked up several pieces of paper and plastic rubbish lying about the place, TWO picnic bar wrappers (boys allergic), a sneaker-boot and some kind of filth-streaked pikachu toy - just yesterday ALONE. When weeding along the fence line I found the roses and rose branches that one of the neighbours' daughters had specifically requested when she saw we were trimming and pruning - apparently just so she could change her mind and dump them back over the fence when we weren't looking.

Last week on Friday I discovered a giant orange safety cone - no doubt stolen from the DCC roadworks on Hillside Rd and carted about 3 or so blocks to our house, uphill (they're REALLY committed to being jerks it seems - good on them), and dumped behind our letterbox.

Today our recycling bin has "disappeared". It costs $12 to replace ORRRR I send the police round asking them to return our bin. Nice and friendly like. OR I call our friend at DCC Animal Control to come and take away their annoying dog - actually that would probably be more like rescuing the dog....

Did I mention that earlier this week, in a rather saint-like act of good will that I gave them ALL a ride to school when we ourselves were late AND their ride didn't show?

Anyway,....as I'm "mulling" over all of this I'm SO trying to imagine the "Going on a Bear Hunt" song but with "witch" substituted in instead of "Bear".

GUTTED

2010-12-07T22:57:00.000-08:00

I think I may just have done something that means that I have thoughtlessly robbed myself (and others in my family) of several weeks, nay months even, of rip-roaring amusement!!

Bear got sprayed in the weekend by his bottle of fizzy that someone had obviously given a good shaking (I feel this is a somewhat necessary precursor to the following story)

We were sitting at dinner and Bear picked up Monk's water bottle from the table. He proceeded to shake it fiercely. He then cautiously uncapped the top and peered gingerly through the hole - nothing. He re-capped the bottle and proceeded to shake the bottle vigorously again. Again he carefully opened the bottle top and peered expectantly inside - nothing. He repeated this process again and again - several times - each time with the same result. AND with me quietly bemused, watching the whole thing. Finally, I let him in on a little secret - "Bear - it's filled with water. NOTHING'S gonna happen."

Almost immediately afterwards I felt the first smarting pangs of regret - what had I done?? Weeks of entertainment, thrown carelessly and thoughlessly away.....!

DARN.

SERIOUSLY though....

2010-12-07T19:07:00.000-08:00

I'm not the only one who sees these and thinks "Adult nappy covers?" - right?? RIGHT?!?!?!!

Christmas-y Highlights and Random Thoughts

2010-12-06T22:53:00.000-08:00

Wombat hiding in the Christmas tree box and us pretending we can't see/find him.

Wombat's seal of approval (manic dancing) of a youtube selection of Boney M Christmas songs.

How cool would it be to have a Boney M Christmas album.

Chris informs me that our new Christmas tree has 872 tips (branches to be fluffed out) - correction 871 (one broke) - and that consequently the tree will have to stay out ALL. YEAR. ROUND.

Monk inquires whether we will be decorating tonight after we have put the tree up.

Chris further comments that he thinks it will take us FOUR days to put the new Christmas tree up - THREE of those will just be for putting the actual tree up : P

Before I even see the tree Monk comes and tells me (as I weed the garden's brick path) that the new tree is 6ft - that they could've got the 7ft tree but they got the 6ft tree.

Never one to miss out on an opportunity - as soon as we enter the lounge and I see the tree in its box - clearly barely taller than our tallest child - I immediately exclaim in mock outrage:

"Why, that tree's NOT 6ft!! It's barely even taller than YOU!"

My clever wit - clearly too clever for our children - completely lost on the children who insist that the tree is 6ft - pointing out to me on the box exactly where it says 6ft! My moment of comic brilliance lost.

Wish I hadn't neglected to recharge the camera batteries so I could have photographed Chris' frustration and annoyance at fluffing out 872/1 fake Christmas tree branches.

Bear decided he would impersonate a parrot with the broken Christmas tree branch. VERY convincing.

Feliz Navidad everyone!!

PS - I think Chris should be grateful they got the 6fter

Oh the irony....!

2010-12-02T13:00:00.000-08:00

"Stay out of the kitchen!!!!" I yell at the Wombat as I'm stooped over the floor picking up large pieces of a ceramic bowl he accidentally knocked to the floor - of course, as I am loudly warning my child to stay out of the kitchen or else he may be hurt or cut I manage to simultaneously slice the ring finger on my right hand. Of course.

Things I just don't get #2

2010-11-17T22:06:00.000-08:00

*People who almost do things, but then for some reason decide not to - for instance, the other day I was pushing my trolley out of the supermarket with my groceries all packed up. In front of me was a guy with an empty trolley. He too was pushing his trolley. He pushed it all the way to the trolley bay near the doors (a few feet away), right to the end of several rows of trolleys - he looked like he was going to add his trolley to one of the rows - but nooooo! He didn't. He just left it there cross-ways of the rows of trolleys simultaneously blocking people off from trolleys and also blocking the way if you were removing a trolley - WHO does THAT!??!??

*People who drive at 60k on an 80k limit MOTORWAY and yet seem completely incapable of keeping to residential area speed limits - WHAT. IS. WRONG. WITH. THEM????!!!

*Why people persist in trying to find a part or parts that are edible of poisonous substances eg. Fugu aka Puffer Fish, Red Kidney Beans etc - what, specifically, makes someone think - ok, well, yes, those first 50 or so people may have died from eating this...but that doesn't mean that ALL of it is poisonous and I'll be darned if we're not going to keep trying and find that edible part!! - I mean, REALLY? Who is THAT desperate for food? Who are they trying to impress?

*Garlic Hummus. GAAAAAH. I know, I know, I've mentioned this before - but now there is an actual flavour named JUST that. It's REALLY annoying. Really.

Dodged that bullet!!

2010-11-15T21:31:00.001-08:00

The Monk informed me this evening that all he wants for Christmas is the jetpack he just saw on the News on tv - phew! That's a relief. And here I was worried he might request something COMPLETELY ridiculous.

What the heyyyyyy...??

2010-11-12T03:24:00.001-08:00

I can add pictures on this blog, but don't seem to be able to on Anarashii - what gives??

Anyone else with this problem?

SUMMER SALE at Ami-Ana

2010-11-10T15:07:00.000-08:00

It's decided. I'm having a Summer Sale over at Ami-Ana! (even though "Summer" is technically officially a few weeks away)

The plan is for it to be a gradual sale with me discounting and featuring/announcing items that have joined the Summer Sale ranks over time.

So to start it all off here is a pic of the first official Ami-Ana Summer Sale item!

Available at both Ami-Ana on Etsy as well as Ami-Ana on Felt. I will also create an Ami-Ana Summer Sale photo album over at the Ami-Ana FB page and will add to it as I announce each new sale item so keep an eye out there too. This stunner was originally $89NZ, then it was discounted to $75NZ - and now it's practically a steal at $50NZ ($38.50USD - awesome if you live in the US!). Please note - This special Summer Sale price will last only last as long as there are ponchos left! Be quick! ; )

Happy Summer Christmas shopping!
OR just happy Summer Sale shopping!

Do my EARS deceive me??

2010-11-09T02:24:00.000-08:00

I am by now well accustomed and will readily admit to the foul smell of grilling capsicum - on previous occasions when I have grilled/roasted it for making hummus it has repeatedly set off the smoke alarm in our lounge - hence, I am now somewhat of an old hand at this and consequently open all the windows and doors that one can within reason - in anticipation!

As my boys and hubby returned home from school this afternoon they were greeted with the mere beginnings of the putrid scent of grilling capsicum. I must say they all play the tortured victim rather well - for duration of the grilling process husband and children alike held their noses and moaned and groaned about the foulness and torturous-ness of it all. That is all the children bar one. Whilst his older brothers groaned loudly and incessantly, clutching their noses with pained faces - the wombat, as per usual, attempted to copy all this "older brother" stuff - pained face - check. Boisterous complaining - check. Pinched nose - ba-bow.

It seemed somewhere along the way that the wombat got a bit confused and instead of pinching his nose to block out the heinous scent he instead feverishly covered his ears.

UNBEARABLY cute and amusing!

FINE!!

2010-11-04T03:31:00.000-07:00

This is what I automatically think of when I hear the word "fine".

Lazy Domesticity #3

2010-11-04T03:06:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago a bunch of us all got together and had a big potluck to farewell a couple of friends off who were moving to Oz - I made this or at least a variation thereof and a number of friends commented on it so I've decided it's only fair that I "share the joy".

And YES this is another one of my so-called "default" meals.

Differences between "my" lasagne and the recipe on the foodinaminute website - As a mother I'm going for simplicity (what I have readily available) as well as what my boys will eat - I don't readily have canned chilli beans available nor will my boys eat spicy foods (which let's be honest a lot of foods that claim to be "mild" still are) so these are swapped out for a can of regular baked beans without a second thought. Green capsicum - if I have it, it goes in. Tomato paste - also "optional" in my opinion - if I have some I put it in. Parsley - not a fan, so I'm not gonna rush out to buy it especially for this. Parmesan - although I DO buy it to make pesto with - is SMELLY - kids don't like smelly - so I just use regular mild cheese. I grate with the side of the grater with the smallest holes so that I can get more volume with less cheese. I also don't serve this with guacamole.
HOWEVER - I DO add a few things - one grated carrot and at least one grated zucchini when I add the can of beans, and sometimes I add ripped spinach/silverbeet leaves if I have them. Also if EVERYONE in the fam loved mushrooms then I would no doubt add sliced mushrooms as well - YUM. I have also used cream cheese when I didn't have cottage cheese available.

Also here's a little variation I did once with some Venison Chris cooked up.

Why no photos? you ask. Our computer went bust a week or so ago and it is STILL away being fixed so we are living off our laptop. Superspeed - Yes. All our regular, familiar programmes, pictures etc - No.

Super Speed is good though. Not knocking super speed.

Anyway - I digress - hope you all enjoy and perhaps try some variations of your own! I am dying to try a variation using a delicious lentil spaghetti sauce recipe I know mmmmmm - that another time perhaps!

Oddities

2010-10-28T03:38:00.000-07:00

One of Chris' lame attempts to irk me.

Don't get it? I like spoons to face down after being washed - otherwise water pools in them and they stain/get marked.

Just one of my oddities.

Things that DON'T impress me

2010-10-19T01:32:00.000-07:00

I'm thinking that people who speed think they are pretty impressive - well, I'm here to tell you:
You're NOT. You're just a faster than average idiot. ESPECIALLY if it's raining*.

*Or other extreme/hazardous weather conditions.

SKANKY campaign for the foolhardy and gullible

2010-10-14T00:09:00.001-07:00

I just had to comment on this because it's going around FB and it's just SO repulsive to me - I don't see how ANYONE could think this was a good idea.

THIRD time I've received this message:

One of my friends has suggested that we women should do something special on facebook in order to increase awareness of October Breast Cancer Awareness month. It's so easy to do, that I'd love you to join in to make this a memorable online event.
Last year, the idea was to post the colour of the bra you were wearing on facebook...and it left men wondering for days, why women were posting colours, seemingly at random.
This year's game has to do with your handbag/purse, where we put our handbag the moment we get home; for example "I like it on the couch", "I like it on the kitchen counter", "I like it on the dresser". Well u get the idea. Just put your answer as your status (i.e. don't respond to this message, but put it on your status) - and cut n paste this message and forward to all your FB female friends to their inbox.
The bra game made it to the news. Let's get the purse in as well and see how powerful we women really are!!!
REMEMBER - DO NOT PUT YOUR ANSWER AS A REPLY TO THIS MESSAGE- PUT IT IN YOUR STATUS!!! PASS THIS TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW

After receiving this insulting message THREE times I finally "cracked" and responded thus:

This "campaign" is SOOOOO skanky. WHO would portray themselves in such a skanky, repulsive way or insinuate such things about themselves "supposedly" in the name of "breast cancer awareness" - what a JOKE!! In fact I'm sure that's what this all is - an innuendo filled rubbish campaign designed by some sexed up male (who's sitting laughing his head off somewhere that so many women could be SO easily suckered) designed to get women worldwide to portray themselves as whoring garbage. Are we REALLY willing to show that we are THIS stupid??? HOW exactly does this raise awareness for breast cancer......?

Payback's a .....Louse?

2010-09-30T21:01:00.000-07:00

Yup. You read that right. First - some background on this. About a week ago our poor little wombat lost his hat. HIS hat. The hat that is practically (Chris and I concluded) "Essence" of Wombat :(

Here is a pic of our wee guy in HIS hat

Wombat and I were at the Super Market and he was being silly with said treasured hat - a Knitted Brown Wool cap with a crocheted peak made with love by none other than ME!!! - anyway, he was being silly with his hat and dangling it over the side of the trolley and then when we got to the counter to pay I realised he had dropped it somewhere along the way. We paid and then went back to look but to no avail. We also left our name and number at the Customer Service's desk in case some kind person should hand it in - alas, it seemed the Super Market was just plum out of kind persons that particular day wouldn't you know it.

Wombat was pretty gutted. He stopped me as we left the Super Market and insisted we had forgotten his hat and that we needed to go back for it. I informed him that it now belonged to someone else. That that's what happens when you're "silly" with your stuff. That he had lost it and that someone else had picked it up, thinking themselves lucky no doubt, and not handing it - some mean, nasty, conscience-less fiend had picked it up and kept it....yup. The next time we went to the Super Market the Wombat inquired after his hat AGAIN and I had to AGAIN inform him that he had lost it and some unscrupulous opportunist had discovered it and absconded with it. I secretly prayed that although someone else was now enjoying HIS hat, that REALLY, somewhere deep down inside they were being totally and completely consumed with GUILT.

Turns out I needn't have wasted the time dreaming up such a wish. Karma it seems is as automatic as NZ Post's Insurance inclusive prices for packages under a certain contents' value! How so? you ask. Well,....a few days ago I happened to discover that the Wombat has NITS. HEADLICE that is. His hair is RIDDLED with eggs!!! Also when we treated his hair and scalp with MOOV (fabulous stuff!!!) and rinsed it out in the shower, his head fairly "rained" dead lice - quite impressive really. So now,...I'm feeling rather calm and happy and totally not wishing an impossibly guilt ridden life on my baby's hat's stealer (does that make sense? Grammatically?). Nope. Rather I'm hoping this mystery person or their child is wearing it well.

Actually I can't seem to stop myself snickering evilly, gleefully even* (yes - both silent and right out loud) at the mere thought of the unexpected consequences of their dastardly actions - muaaahhhahahahahhaaaa.

Payback's a LOUSE.

*When I snicker gleefully over this in my head I imagine my laugh sounding not too dissimilar to Dash's laugh when he discovers he can run on water.

Na na na na naaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...

2010-09-23T17:22:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I told Chris/Fuzz:
"The Partridge family cut through our property today."
Fuzz: Whaaa..? What?
Me: That's my way of saying a BUS LOAD of people cut through our place today.

A BUS LOAD you say incredulously - why yes.

The neighbour. Her THREE children. Rebecca Robinson (other neighbour) from the "condemned house". And some tall, lanky, unindentified, school-uniformed, heavy-footed boy, galloping down our drive like a horse. All at once.

Oh no - don't mind ME, I just live here. Go right ahead *gritted teeth*

PS - the title is supposed to be some lame reference of mine to the Partridge Family.

Shark Attack Hat on Etsy by "ObeyMyBrain"

2010-09-20T18:06:00.000-07:00

I thought this would be the perfect understated halloween outfit for a guy. Chris didn't think so. He said it was stupid.

I can just imagine wearing it and pretending it wasn't there to see if you could get a bite.

"What? A shark on my head? What on earth are you talking about??"

Lazy domesticity #2

2010-09-18T18:30:00.000-07:00

At long last....Numero 2 in my mental list of easy peasy "from scratch" default (read lazy) meals - "Bisto Steak"

You will need:

A family pack of Chuck Steak (I've found Chuck steak to be consistently tender even more so than expensive so-called tender meats like Porterhouse and Rump Steak)

Onions

Carrots

Peas/Celery/Zucchini

Bisto gravy mix ( I buy it by the box)

Potatoes

Kumara

Mushrooms

water

Potatoe peeler

Knife/knives ( I use a heavier larger knife for the root veges and a smaller, lighter paring knife for the softer veges like mushrooms/celery/zucchini)

Large oblong shaped dish

Preheat oven to 180 Celsius (approx. 350 F or adjust to suit with gas ovens).

Fill your dish with a little bit of water - less than a centimetre in depth (this will make a nice gravy when cooked as opposed to a watery broth).Chop onions and chuck them in. Cut Steak into palm sized medallions and arrange over the onions - no overlapping!

Sprinkle over one tablespoon of bisto powder. Peel and slice carrots (I cut mine on an angle) - scatter carrots and your choice of peas, sliced celery or zucchini (or all three! My family is not keen on celery or zucchini as options but either are nice - the zucchini especially!) Sprinkle over two more tablespoons of bisto powder.

Peel and cut potatotes and kumara - leave smallish potatoes whole, cut very large potatoes in half or even 3 pieces.

Wash and cut mushrooms in chunky pieces and scatter over top. Sprinkle 2 more tablespoons of bisto powder over top. Cover with tin foil and cook for an hour and half - even better if your dish has a lid use that!

When finished test potatoes and kumara - they should be perfect and meat nice and tender. Eat with salad or other cooked veges like broccoli. Delish!....and EASY!!

Chris often cooks this too and people are always impressed cos it looks like such hard work - muahahahhahaaaaa!

Post Scriptus...

2010-09-17T18:10:00.001-07:00

(following on from previous post)

Fuzz: Just what kind of things can you do with these mind powers of yours?

Me: (with raised eyebrow and mysterious sultry look) Wouldn't YOU like to know.....?

What sarcasm...?

2010-09-17T18:03:00.000-07:00

Me - YELLING - literally to get his attention - to "Bear" (the middle child): Did you have your puffas (inhaler) this morning?

B: N.O. NO.

Me: How about you have them right now then?

B: How about you get them down for me so I can have them then?

Me: (sitting at the table eating my lunch) Well hang on a minute and I'll use my mind powers to get them down from the cupboard for you (raise hand to touch the right temple and scrunch eyes with an intense focused facial expression)

(from the kitchen - Fuzz: You have mind powers?!?!?!!! (Yes and Nod from me) Whoa!!!)

What I KNOW.....

2010-09-09T16:13:00.000-07:00

Was at a surprise birthday party for a very good friend last night. The party had barely started when another friend's husband filled his cup a little too much and before you know - over flowing coke everywhere! What does the male do/say?
G: Love! Love! Love! Help, help, help! (followed by running away)
Friend M begins to mop up spilt drink with serviettes. G watches on and nods - us girls "descend" on G, mocking and disparaging him for running away from his own mess like a helpless git.
G turns to me - It's woman's work - you KNOW this.
Me: All I know is that you will be buying a rather large, exorbitant gift to make up for this (*wink* at M)
M smiles and nods in agreement.

Classic.

Felt auction for Christchurch, NZ

2010-09-07T04:51:00.001-07:00

I chatted briefly with Lucy from Felt tonight - consoling each other over the lost heritage of historic Christchurch buildings since the 7.1 strength earthquake (and continuing after shocks) on Saturday morning, the inevitably changed landscape of the CBD and the various inspiring and honourable initiatives that have been started in the earthquake's wake. Someone had asked Lucy if Felt would be doing anything to help with the effort - I commented that this could be problematic considering the varied crafts that were available from various stores on Felt - but then I had a light bulb moment! We could ask individual Felt stores to donate items for an auction - the proceeds of which to be donated to the clean-up and rebuilding of Christchurch - that could work!!

Soooo.....here is the plug - PLEASE if you own a Felt store, or know someone who does - please consider donating an item from your store or two or SEVERAL!! Let's do our part to help Christchurch back on her feet!

ALSO - we didn't get so far as to discuss where we would send all the donated items to or where and when the auction would be held so please feel free to suggest - I've also posted about this on the Felt Forum, on my facebook Ami Ana fan page and will also be posting on my other blog Anarashii. Please feel free to post about this yourself on your FB page, your blog, where ever and spread the word to other Felt-ers :D

Before.......and After.....Aaaaaahhhhh!!

2010-09-02T21:40:00.001-07:00

Good bye.....!

See ya!

Aaaaahhhh!! SO much better!

You're KIDDING???

2010-09-02T15:41:00.001-07:00

Came home to ORANGE spew splattered all over the bottom of our driveway yesterday. Some of the kids informed us it was spew. It was disgusting. I turned to Chris and said:

"You're KIDDING?!? SPEW?? Who spews in someone's driveway???"

Chris - "It happens"

Me - "Not if you're NOT using someone else's driveway as your OWN private walkway it doesn't!"

This morning as I checked the letterbox after dropping the boys off at school I noticed that I couldn't open the letterbox because the metal loop that the lock fits through had been bent upwards at probably a roughly 135 degree angle from it's previous/normal position.

I guess I should be glad the spew was on the drive.

Wardrobe Wednesday.....FAIL!

2010-09-01T04:56:00.000-07:00

This is actually from last week when I attempted to take a photo of myself. A decent photo. Which actually ended up being several photos. None of which were flattering. Except perhaps this one. Maybe. It also led to the realisation that the red top I was wearing was an EXTREMELY unflattering top...

WHY.....

2010-08-18T20:51:00.000-07:00

...are we REQUIRED to be able to back (reverse) around a corner?

Why, for those rare, yet very real and memorable moments in life when we come in contact with morons who decide it would be a GREAT idea to double park on a narrow little side street.
THAT is why.
Yup.

GIVE-AWAY on Anarashii!

2010-08-12T21:23:00.000-07:00

I've just posted a give-away on Anarashii for a pair of knitted baby mitts - a current new design still technically "in the works" - I'm not one to beg for followers or anything, so all you need do to qualify is leave a comment and your name and I shall randomly draw the name of the winner. So if you, or someone you know, is pregnant, currently has a baby/young child, knows someone who is and is in desperate need of a gift - be sure to check it out and be in to win!

PS - just a reminder - you need to comment on the Give-away post on Anarashii - Best of luck! :D

'Spect you'll wanna see me Specs....

2010-08-07T17:01:00.000-07:00

Ordered me some new glasses from Zennioptical, highly recommended to me by both Ange* and Mariah (who just happens to be Ange's sister).

Pros and Cons - Pros first - they are EXTREMELY cheap!! Also the postage is not out of this world. They arrived pretty quickly (mine arrived Friday).

Cons - it is an American site yet nowhere does it say clearly that it is or state that the prices are in USD - I always find this sort of thing a little annoying. Also because it is an American site there are problems when entering your details - I had to re-enter all my details at least 3 times because apparently they were "invalid" - what happens as a result of America-centric required address details.

All in all the pros majorly outweigh the cons however so I am still recommending this site to others - with the caveat that they will require a generous amount of PATIENCE in dealing with the site.

And so, without further ado (cos I know you all must just be fairly chaffing at the bit to see!*cough*) - me in me new specs:

*Here is the actual blog post where she raves about them :)

MORE encouraging incidents and comments from the "Murderhouse" aka Dental School

2010-08-06T21:32:00.000-07:00

Yes - yet more encouraging incidents and comments from my visit to the Dental School yesterday....

incident: after they had finished I went to the toilet on my way out - fortunately for me! Doubly fortunately there are LARGE mirrors in the toilets by which I could quite easily see several smears of foreign white substance all over one side of my face - what? NOTHING?! Not one word? No - oh, you might want to get to a mirror and clean your face off? UN.BE.LIEV.ABLE.

Also, luckily as I peeked in the mirror I noticed that my mouth was full of blood. It was then that I remembered this particular comment (from the Tutor no less)

Comment: Hopefully that stops bleeding....

Not exactly brimming with confidence with comments like these guys!

Also I kept falling asleep again, they REALLY need to let me crochet or something while they're working on my teeth.
It does prove one thing though - it IS possible to doze off in an uncomfortable chair, with a sore neck, at the Dentist due to sheer boredom and lack of activity. It IS.

Are we on the same page here...?

2010-08-06T01:54:00.000-07:00

Earlier at the Dental School....:

Dental Student: (upon completing work on my teeth) How are you feeling?
Me: My face is stinging.
Dental Student: Oh, it's just the cement - it can be a little irritating sometimes...
Me: My face is STINGING. Right HERE. And HERE. And along HEEEEEEERE.
Dental Student: (turning to assisting fellow dental student) Alcohol wipe.

At this point I'd like to point out that I thought - ALCOHOL wipe? I say my face is STINGING and your answer is to fix it with an ALCOHOL wipe??? Needless to say I had serious concerns about "curing" STINGING with an ALCOHOL wipe.

Assisting Dental Student wipes the stinging areas on my face that I had indicated.
Me: It's making it WORSE!!!!!

I wash my face off with water from a cup they pour for me. ALCOHOL wipe?!? WHAT were they THINKING?!?!!

What to do when Monsters descend upon you...

2010-08-04T00:56:00.000-07:00

Me (to the kids, as I head outside to fetch wood for the fire in the dark of night): If I scream it's just the monsters eating me....(afterthought) run and shut the door!

TOUGH Talk - Mama style

2010-08-03T14:37:00.000-07:00

Up till now we have always known Monk to be allergic to peanuts - we came to this logical conclusion once when he was very young when A chocolate CRUMB from a peanut slab made his face and neck puff up and also develop red whelps not unlike those caused by nettles. Fairly straightforward conclusion from there.

A couple of days ago Fuzz decided to give Monk a peanut MnM to see if he had grown out of his allergy. Monk ate it. Didn't like the taste. No reaction. GREAT!

Yesterday, Monk - who you will remember decided he didn't like the taste of peanuts - insisted that he wanted to try a WHOLE peanut slab - all to himself! Now I would argue that he was keen to try this, not to further test his seemingly disappearing allergy, but for the mere sheer quantity of chocolate to peanut ratio - but I may be wrong....however, he was not able to consume it without holding his nose - when questioned whether he liked it or not he responded testily with:
"I'm eating it, aren't I?"
I commented to him that if he was not able to eat it without holding his nose then he obviously didn't like it....And then the closer...because as a Mother, constantly making sure he avoided peanuts, and making sure that others knew he should till now, it occurred to me that just because he had eaten a peanut or two didn't necessarily mean he was over his allergy - it could just be evolving - he could be setting himself up for a big downfall. It occurred to me, that he might have a delayed reaction - I mentioned as much.

"What's a delayed reaction?" queried Monk, cluelessly.
Me:"It means you might die in an hour or two, instead of right away!"

What the...???

2010-07-30T21:13:00.001-07:00

I just saw this featured in the Storque on Etsy.

What the...????

So my first thoughts in all honesty were - some sort of mistake...? This was perhaps meant to be featured on the Front Page of Regretsy?

Hmmmm....need I say more....

OR...Perhaps this is what happens when Cookie Monsters go bad?

Memorable Moments #2

2010-07-30T17:51:00.001-07:00

I used to work at BONZ in Christchurch - which for those of you not in the know is a very upmarket "Souveneir" store - the type that thinks of themselves as SO fancy schmancy that they deign not to be referred to as a mere "Souveneir" store - and yet - that is what they are.
Especially with a name that is an acronym for "Best of New Zealand" - I mean - REALLY.

Anyway...
This one time I was helping out one of the Japanese Sales Assistant's with his American Customers - he didn't feel altogether confident with his English and asked me to help out - so I struck up a conversation with his customers while he sorted out the details of their purchases. It was easy to guess where they were from - they had Boston accents. And if I hadn't picked up on it from the accent surely I would have just as quickly picked it up from their straightforward no nonsense attitude - well, at least the husband's....

So, there I was chatting away with them, talking about their travels, where they were going to next and it turned out they were headed to Fiji next - well, wouldn't you know but Fiji had just recently had a military coup (it's getting to be a bit of a hobby really, isn't it?)...So I asked them if this was something that concerned them since they were travelling there next. The husband responded immediately,
"No. I have a GUN."

Awkward. What's that noise? Oh it's the sound of the conversation crashing and burning.

I mean really - what can you say to that?

Lesson learned

2010-07-29T19:02:00.000-07:00

NEVER lick food off your fingers when you've been rinsing things with Dettol. No matter HOW delicious that morsel looks - DON'T do it!!!! Blecch.

(learned this, to my great misfortune, the other morning)

Memorable Moments

2010-07-28T16:47:00.000-07:00

It's kinda vague now that I think back but I definitely remember slamming Fuzz's car door shut on my hand. I remember that it was weird. VERY weird. WEIRD? Yes, weird. Weird because I didn't really feel any pain - well maybe a bit - but not nearly as much as you'd think you know? Like when you get stung by a bee on your foot and at first you think it's a prickle, until you look and see it's actually a bee and then it's automatically a gazillion times more painful because you can clearly SEE that you've stood on a bee and not a prickle (I've had this happen to me). Yet I felt the door close on my hand, and I actually stood there for a good few minutes musing over how the door was shut on my hand, and how said door was flush with the car - and yet - unbelievably my hand was somehow in there squished betwixt car door and car body - HOW??? I also took a few moments to wonder why it wasn't particularly sore and how best to extricate my hand. OW.

So there you go - the first of many memorable moments.

And really....it didn't hurt all that bad - although possibly shock and endorphins mercifully kicked in and saved me. Who knows...

Deciphering Wombat-speak

2010-07-22T18:45:00.000-07:00

"Ginja tisses ate meeee, mmmmmmm"

The Wombat's (aka Little J) attempt to tell his Grandma about some Ginger Kisses we jointly devoured.

Breakfast "Buddies"

2010-07-20T20:36:00.000-07:00

When: Tuesday Morning
Scene: Table - Breakfast time

Monk: Everyone is having something different for breakfast except for me and Mum! Mum! You're having the exact same breakfast as ME! (that would be, porridge)
Me: No, I'm not having the same breakfast as you - I don't have milk with mine OR 5 different kinds of sugar!
Monk: *outraged scowl*

To be truthful he doesn't really have 5 different kinds of sugar on his porridge - he only has TWO.

BIKKURI

2010-07-19T15:20:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Fuzz surprised us all by joining in with us for Zumba.

It was certainly entertaining watching the other women's faces as they turned up and saw him participating.

Part way through I murmured to him,

"When we get home I'll bring up youtube so that I can show you a video of the ONLY other male in Dunedin, apart from you, that's doing Zumba."

Highlight of my day

2010-07-14T19:29:00.000-07:00

I was taking my bowl and spoon to the kitchen to wash (after a delicious lunch of jelly sponge) when I had one of my frequent bouts of sheer brilliance - Monk had gone through to use the toilet and I knew he'd be back through the door in a sec - predictably neglecting to wash his hands. Soooo... instead of taking my bowl and spoon to the sink, I hid just by the back door beside the bathroom door, out of sight and waited - as soon as I heard the door open I yelled ,

"WASH YOUR HANDS!!!!"

at the top of my voice and then "sat back" and relished the subsequent fall-out.

It was the funniest thing. EVER.

(Yup, I'm STILL laughing).

Pirate eyes, they're watching youuuuu...

2010-07-14T17:51:00.000-07:00

Okay - just to be clear - I do know that the song isn't Pirate eyes. I DO. Just my attempt at a catchy title.

Now. On with the story...

On our recent trip to Christchurch we took the older boys to a 1, 2 and 3 dollar shop at Eastgate so they could blow all their dosh on junky stuff - you know, the usual.

JJ Jonstarrrr got himself (amongst other things) a wee Pirate kit that had more in it than you'd have thought! An eye patch, pirate treasure/coins (of course), a nasty plasticy pirate bandana and a clip on pirate-y hoop earring.

Chris tried it on for laughs and to see if his beard made him look extra pirate-y. The result made me erupt in fits of uncontrollable laughter - see for yourself:

Chris/Fuzz: How does it look?

(or he may have said How do I look? or perhaps he meant do I look pirate-y? Suit a pirate-y hoop earring?)

Me: You look like you have a keyring in your ear.

Togs...Undies, Undies, UNDIES!!!

2010-07-14T16:40:00.000-07:00

Scene - our lounge

When - This morning

Me (spying underpants STILL lying on the floor): Monk! Pick those (dirty) underpants up! Or I'll make you wear them when we go to the shop - and I don't mean on your bottom!"

Monk promptly dealt with the undies.

What if.....?

2010-07-06T04:03:00.000-07:00

You consigned some items at a store that has continually had shady dealings with you in the past - a store that you now, choose to no longer consign your items with on account of said shady dealings....would you name and shame??

And what would it take?

I am currently ruminating on just such a situation - here is pretty much what I'm weighing up as I agonise over whether to name and shame or no...

* I know other innocent people are currently consigning with said store or will choose to in the future

* These people would perhaps choose NOT to consign with them if I spoke up

* Said store has an unspoken price "limit" for their store ie. they purport to be advocates of "Handmade" but in actuality they just want as cheap as poss so that they can in turn slog it off as cheaply as poss.

* On account of this said store has stolen ideas of mine and attempted to reproduce them - cheap and nasty attempted knock-offs!

* Said store has then lost all "motivation" to sell my items, removed them from their store without any discussion and stored them in their Garage.

* Said store did not inform me of their storing my items in their Garage for several months - in fact not until I repeatedly followed up and inquired after my items.

* Said store undercut me with their cheap nasty attempted knock-offs of my items or found others who would.

* Said store returned items damaged beyond repair, missing tags or key items eg. a Pattern from a Kit!!!

* Said store NEVER informed me of a damaged item or returned it for repair (a very simple task for me!) but instead "attempted" to "repair" and ended up pretty much destroying said item - I only found this out by way of a note in a box of my returned items.

* Said store did not inform me of missing item from Kit or missing tags or parts from other items or apologise for these things.

Sooooo.....what would you do?

Name and shame?

I feel quite ill just thinking on all of this - and here I was feeling relieved that all was over and done with this store and now I have to follow up on this missing pattern - who knows who has it now or if it's being copied/reproduced/sold. Just downright DESPICABLE if you ask me.

Should I chase them up on this missing pattern/incomplete kit?? Should I just let it go?

And IF I do let the pattern go.... should I still warn others about this store....?

In quite the conflicted quandry over this : (

Eclipse(d)...?

2010-06-29T01:35:00.000-07:00

With the advent of Eclipse fast approaching I feel "moved" to share one of my fav "How it should have ended" clips. For those friends of mine who know my feelings about all things Twilight this shouldn't be a surprise. It's a goodie - enjoy -

This seriously cracks me up :D

A moment of your time....

2010-06-28T03:55:00.000-07:00

Care to suggest a caption?

I have one in mind...even considering emailing this pic to Tuffy themselves.

How much will they give me? (aside from world-wide fame for my little one that is....? er well, perhaps "world-wide" fame in ....NZ?)

Oh and which picture is BEST?

Some Personal MJ Favourites

2010-06-24T19:34:00.000-07:00

As I was driving home from dropping the boys off at school I heard on the radio that today is the anniversary of Michael Jackson's death, in memory of him they began playing MJ hits back to back from 9am. OH YEAH. It was close - I almost didn't make it out of the car...!

So I thought, appropriate surely to share some of my own favs - will they surprise you?

Well, firstly is this funky little number that until today I never knew was a cover of a Stevie Wonder song.
Definitely a winner in my books.

Funnily enough I was watching Rush Hour on Wednesday night when they played a short clip of this song that I had actually forgotten about! Shame on me.

Some other sure favs include (all from his Music and Me album) Cinderella stay awhile, We've got forever and All the things you are as well as others naturally.

For instance I was just remarking to Chris how this is probably one of the coolest scenes in a movie EVER. And naturally Thriller is what makes it.

There are many others that I certainly don't have time to name (let alone link to!), however I think it fitting to end with this mish-mash of MJ hits. Fairly impressive.

What are your favourites? Annnnd most importantly can you do this....?

The High Road ; )

2010-06-24T04:01:00.000-07:00

Maybe I should pray for my neighbours.

j/k

Okay,....only a little....

Much thanks goes to Pearl, for putting me onto this guy - Thanks Pearl!

DONE!

2010-06-23T18:11:00.000-07:00

Finished the new/replacement mittens for JJ - I messed up with one side of one of them. Also they don't look quite right somehow - the thumbs don't look right. Or something. Too small? Need to be longer? Or maybe just misplaced. Something to work on. Well here are the finished items. Will add a pick of them on the boy himself later.

One looks smaller than the other doesn't it. And no - I don't know why my text colour changes after I copy and paste a picture but it is VERY A.NNOY.IIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNG!!!

PESTO Pasta!!

2010-06-23T01:43:00.000-07:00

I had a stab at making fresh basil and cashew pesto on Sunday night.

My thoughts? - one word only - YUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM.

Then...I couldn't wait to cook up some hot pasta and stir some through - which I did - for lunch. The very next day.

And I shared some with the little guy. Success! He loved it too! Huzzah!

He also kept wanting to look at all the pictures I took of him enjoying his PESTO Pasta! Has a ring to it, doesn't it?

Toasty!!

2010-06-17T04:08:00.001-07:00

Finally got round to finishing off some Mittens I was supposedly making for JJ aka "Donts" as the wee man likes to call him. Mittens that I was procrastinating even though they take barely any time to make on account of them being for a child. That's why I like making accessories like this for children - take no time at all! And the sense of accomplishment.....GRAND.

Anyway, first time makin' 'em. No pattern. Guessin' and makin' it up as I go....not too shabby.

Next time - work out the 'kinks'. Might make some for myself even - after all they seem to keep your 'mitts' rather toasty.

...Did I startle you....?

2010-06-16T18:58:00.000-07:00

Sorry! That rather loud, abrasive, slightly dorky, mocking laugh was in response to a request I saw from someone on Etsy for a knitted lace DRESS for $100.

ANNNNNND it was WHITE!!

Bahahahhahahhahahahhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Clap clap

2010-06-13T03:34:00.000-07:00

Awesome day today, quite enjoyed interpreting for Mimu at church - although I don't know what I actually enjoyed the most - the interpreting itself OR astounding everyone with what I still know ten PLUS years later (muahaha - evil, glorying laugh).

Although I did feel a bit pet seal-ish near the end when Izaac kept wanting me to translate:

Scene: Me chatting with Mimu in Nihongo. Enter Izaac.

Izaac (looking at and talking to me) : There's gonna be choir for about 30 minutes - is that ok? (then) TRANSLATE!!!

Me: Arf, arf.

Okay.

I didn't actually say "Arf, arf".

You got me.

THAT ain't right!!!!!

2010-06-11T16:08:00.000-07:00

Just got back home from the Monk's weekly Saturday morning soccer game - they won - but not without resistance! From the other team's coach! (who was reffing!)

What happened? Our team was about to TOTALLY get their second goal for the game when a boy from the other team - a boy who was on the sidelines, a boy who wasn't even playing - stepped in front of the goal and deflected the ball!!

What the?!??!!!

Then we (the parents) all start up -

"That was TOTALLY a goal!"

"GOAL Ref!"

" WHAA-AAAAAT?!?! He wasn't even playing?!?!!!"

"That TOTALLY would've gone in if not for the kid, who was subbed off!!!"

Ref verdict? NOT a goal!!!!

BUT he gave them a penalty shot. Which they pounded in there anyway - why not do the fair thing, why not just give them the goal and save yourself some time? I tell a lie! I got this mixed up with ANOTHER goal later in the game that should have been a goal but the ref, once again, reckoned wasn't - in the instance above the ref ruled it wasn't a goal. No penalty shot. NOTHING. (I'm sorry. Now I'm off to nomasu hari senbon).

SCOUNDREL.

There's only one phrase I can think of that perfectly describes my thoughts on this -

"THAT ain't RIIIIIIIGHT!!"

Chris Rock's "Presidential" catch phrase from "Head of State"

REALLY fitting here methinks. REALLY.

My boy (dark hair, red top) with his best mate (blonde, white sneaks, runnin' with the ball) at a tournament a few weeks back - which incidentally they won for their grade - wouldn't you know - this just happens to be the same team they played today! HA!

Quotes to live by.....

2010-06-07T14:28:00.000-07:00

Just thought I'd share - mostly Disney ones - words to live by. really.

Life is like a straw it only sucks when you make it

"What made you decide to become a policeman-officer?" - Hot Fuzz

"I'm sorry Spleen, there's not enough beer in the WORLD" - The Bowler, Mystery Men

"But the animal is inside out....and it exploded" - Teb, Galaxy Quest

"Boy, I bet that must be frustrating" Dory, Finding Nemo

"I cannot heave me heart into my mouth" Cordelia, King Lear

"Brevity is the soul of wit" Polonius, Macbeth

"I like going to book stores and approaching the book clerk and saying - Hi, I'm looking for a book entitled 'How to deal with rejection without killing', can you help me?" - Some random, hilarious comedian I heard once

"Good feeling gone" - Dory, Finding Nemo

"Well that was INCREDIBLY eaaaaaasy" - from How "The Lord of the Rings" should have ended

"I'm not happy Bob. NOT happy." - The Incredibles

"Just, ah, whenever you get a 'fly so fast it reverses time itself' gadget on your belt - let me know" - Superman to Batman on How "Superman" should have ended

"He likes a peanut.....I like a peanut...." - Tantor, Tarzan

"Do you guys even READ the script?!!!" - Guy, Galaxy Quest

"I'm AMAZING. I'm Batman!!" - Dean, Supernatural

"Let's get out of here before one of those things kills Guy." - Gwen, Galaxy Quest

"Remember back in the day where Health and Safety was just called 'Common Sense'?" - A hilarious Aussie comedian whose name I don't recall

"No. I didn't do that." - Jermaine, Flight of the Conchords

Some of these I actually use regularly in everyday life - oh ho! - such as? you say unbelievingly....

"Boy, I bet that must be frustrating!" (Dory) - I use this ALOT. Love it.

What else?

"Well, that was INCREDIBLY eaaaaaaaaaasy," from "How The Lord of the Rings should have ended"

Usually when I'm surprised how easy or quickly something was achieved. Sometimes I forget where this quote is from and Chris likes to torture me until I remember.

"Good feeling GONE" - also another great one from Dory.

"I'm not happy Bob. NOT happy." - we actually used to have the Donts trained to say this when he was younger - we also had Monk trained when very young to say "A bargain!" when we cued him with "What do you get at The Warehouse?" and when we prompted him with "and a money back..." he would pipe up cheerfully "Guarantee!!"

Not so frequently I also like to say.....

"Do you guys even READ the script?!?!?!!" - Guy, Galaxy Quest - OR substitute words in appropriately such as recently with the crazed "neighbor" - does she even LIVE in her house?!?!!

"I'm AMAAAAAZING. I'm Batman." - Dean, Supernatural.

In fact....just this morning, I made a TOTALLY "Batman" worthy saving-catch. 'Twas AMAZING.

Sick day, Late night musings...

2010-06-06T04:19:00.000-07:00

I didn't get to church today. I have a tummy bug. In the interests of being discreet I'll just say that I don't feel nauseous and I'm not throwing up. We'll leave it at that.

As such I've kept myself on the usual strict diet of toast or stewed apple to combat this (we're out of edible bananas and I haven't drummed up the motivation to cook myself some rice). Two days now. Doesn't seem to be working. I usually put my kids on this "diet" when they're afflicted with tummy bugs - it seems to clear things up amazingly quickly - I'm having a re-think, a re-examination of this synopsis now though after eating slice after slice of plain toast and finally giving in and putting spread and Marmite on a couple - just for want of some flavour! Maybe they weren't better methinks now....maybe they were just SICK of this bland "diet".

Which leads me to some further musings on the subject....

I wonder if "reverse psychology" works with this sort of thing....could I eat something that would only make my current affliction worse in the hopes of "tricking" my body....? Would my body really be fooled? Would it think...hang on. she shouldn't be eating this. It's only going to make matters worse!...and then in this particularly confused state would eating the "wrong" thing help me get better rather than worse...?

I'm willing to give it a try....

But an even more attractive option lies in wait - tonight at dinner, Grandma happened to mention that sweetened condensed milk helps clear up these sorts of things - REALLLY? I exclaim hopefully and excitedly.

I must say I feel somewhat duty-bound to test this particular remedy. Oh look and there just happens to be TWO.WHOLE.CANS. in the store room.

What luck!

Imitation whitebait anyone...?

2010-06-01T17:27:00.000-07:00

So lately I've had a bit of a hankering for white bait/shirasu (especially this week when I was planning the week's meals and trying to think of something different for a change).

Then I had this idea - eggs + moyashi (mung bean sprouts) = imitation white bait pattie*!

So today...I broke at the fry pan, whisked up a couple of eggs and added a bunch of homegrown moyashi (yes, I grow my own sprouts! Mung bean and brown lentils mostly) annnnnd....

Oooooh! CHOUDAI!!

and.....

Look at that steam!! Mmmmmmmmmmmm!

Verdict: Delicious! Definitely crunchier than real white bait and also obviously, not fishy tasting! If I remember correctly my Dad used to make these with grated potato but I'm thinking - mung bean sprouts - MUCH healthier! Surely? (we'll just overlook how much spread I put in the pan to start....)

For those who are curious to know how to sprout beans/lentils - 'Tis EASY! Buy yourself some mung beans, brown lentils, chickpeas (not sure what else is good - these are the only one's I've tried - I'm guessing red kidney beans would be out though as they are poisonous if not vigorously boiled for 15 mins). Get some old glass jars. Cover beans/lentils with water and leave to soak over night. In the morning tip out the water - cover your jar(s) with a tea towel or muslin cloth if you have it and put in a warm place (hot water cylinder cupboard is good!) - during the day take your jar(s) out and soak your beans/lentils at least twice a day. They sprout pretty fast - you'll probably start to see wee shoots on the 1st or 2nd day. You're supposed to be able to eat them as soon as they've sprouted - this is also apparently when they're at their peak in nutrients and goodness! Keep soaking, rinsing and warming them until they've reached your desired length and then store them in the fridge (personally I never get to this stage as I'm eating them in sandwiches and salads all along the way!)

The little man had some lunch too....one of his favs - "armite oast" (aka Marmite Toast). He clocked out early though....

*It's called a "pattie" even though it's JUST egg - easy - yay!!

Things I just don't get...

2010-05-31T03:27:00.000-07:00

* Unsweetened whipped cream.....WHY????

* Specifically mentioning "garlic" as a flavour of Hummus eg. Sundried Tomato and garlic - garlic is a main ingredient in Hummus after chickpeas and tahini (I make my own at least weekly) - what gives?!

* People who constantly attempt to post blog-spam on a comment moderated blog - what's the point?!

* I've been reading some reviews on IMDB of the new "Nightmare on Elm Street" re-make movie. One of the main complaints I've noticed is that the "new" Freddy apparently is not so tall as the original and people are complaining that a short Freddy is not so scary - he has knives for fingers! And can kill you in your dreams!!- Who's taking note of height?!

World's next leading Telemarketer deterrent?

2010-05-29T01:49:00.001-07:00

I've been mulling over the amusing conversation I had with the telemarketer the other day and the ridiculousness of the fact that they rang us not even knowing that we had already signed with them. DUH.

And then also, the surprise of the telemarketer, at the revelation that YES we were already customers of theirs.

And I've come to a decision - this response was SO good at producing a satisfyingly dumbfounding effect on the telemarketer that I think I will use it again. Whether we're signed with them or not.

imagined future conversation with telemarketer

telemarketer: Hi this is blahblah from blahblah company and we were in the area and wondering if you were interested in a blah for your home?

Me: We've already got one thanks.

telemarketer: Oh. You do?

Me: Yes

telemarketer: Oh. really?

Me: Yes....well no, I'm lying but we don't want one anyway. THANKS!!!

(click)

This woman is CRAZY

2010-05-27T15:10:00.000-07:00

These were my exact immediate thoughts as I read a "Dear Neighbor" letter from a woman sharing her concern (read: whiny complaints) about noise pollution from the nearby motorway - namely some development on the motorway that the City Council has planned.

A little background about the area where we live:

1. We are right near a MAIN road.

2. Over the main road is the MOTORWAY overbridge.

3. Next to the motorway overbridge are not one but TWO RAIL overbridges - you know, that TRAINS frequently travel back and forth on.

4. Behind all these overbridges AND the main road is a street (practically across the road) that houses CARISBROOK aka The BROOK - Dunedin's current main venue/stadium for all National and International Sporting events, Concerts and so forth.

(here I should also mention that the woman in question resides on the aforementioned MAIN road).

Does this woman even LIVE at her house?!

(said with a tone to mirror Guy's "Do you guys even READ the script?!?" from Galaxy Quest)

As I see it, this woman has two options:

1. Get over it.

2. MOVE!!

Clearly INSANE.

PS - Not to mention this woman spelt Neighbour without a u (hence the italics above).

- Does this woman even LIVE in this country?!? (said like Guy, ....AGAIN)

BEST response to telemarketer.EVER.

2010-05-26T20:50:00.001-07:00

Telemarketer: Hello Mrs (mispronounces name)

Me: Hello - that's Mrs (corrects mispronunciation)

Telemarketer: Oh, I'm so sorry (slightly flustered). This is (name)* from (Electricity company's name)*. We're lowering electricity prices here and were wondering which electricity supplier you're currently with...?

Me: We're with YOU guys! Just recently changed. We're. with. YOU!

Telemarketer: OH.

*Names have been left out to protect caller and company respresented by said caller from HUMILIATING "Die in dirty underwear" EMBARASSMENT.

Aarrghhh! Me "Teethies"!?

2010-05-26T04:19:00.001-07:00

Last Friday I had a dental appointment at the local Dental school (professional treatment for a fraction of the price - well ok, that fraction is still a fair bit....but). I have been assigned to a new dental student - you see last year I had a root canal (not for the faint hearted) - which in all honesty - probably worse than child birth (I've had THREE! - children that is). Sooooooo painful. So all that's left to be done is a crown on top of the tooth that had the root canal - to protect it and keep it strong. While we discussed this, my assigned student also pointed out that perhaps I might fancy some crowns for a few of my other teeth which had rather large visible fillings (he also explained that while they were in pristine condition now, in the future they may get wear and start to leak). We discussed colour too - gold crowns he said while stronger than porcelin "teeth coloured" crowns, are well, GOLD. I agreed - "I don't want to look like a pirate," I responded.

Highlights of Dental visit:

1. Both the dental student and I concurring on the whole undesirable-ness of looking like a pirate c/o Gold crowns.

2. "Teeth coloured" - I really like how the dental student referred to the porcelin crowns as "teeth coloured" - notice NOT "white". "Teeth coloured" I feel is a more realistic description of teeth colour and surely a more desirable shade than "so white they are BLUE" teeth that we see a lot these days c/o the whole whitening craze - want teeth that don't require a darkened room to glow? No thank you!

3. Both the Dental student and said student's tutor said that I had "beautifully cared for teeth" *BEAM*

I'm such a sucker.

Yes. I look like this EVERY day. I REALLY do.

BRILLIANT!

2010-05-26T04:02:00.000-07:00

I'm snickering away to myself because this morning just as we were leaving to take the boys to school I saw my other neighbour's kid cutting back down our drive to his place - NO - this is NOT what I'm snickering about! I'm getting to it!

Anyway, I realised they must've missed their carpool ride to school and offered him and his sister a ride to school after I dropped my own boys off at their school.

So anyway, after I drop my boys off Jake gives me directions to get to their school - which ends up being hidden away in a tangle of narrow side streets (a somewhat bizarre place for a school I thought!). Then it turns out I can't even drive round the front of the school because that end of the street is one-way - so instead I drive round the back of the school and drop them off.

Then......just as I'm pulling out to go home what should I see...but the green carpool van that the kids usually catch a ride with every morning to school - driving past me and around (I presume) to the front of the school.

So.....the kids miss their ride, I offer them a ride instead - after their ride has left, I drop my own kids off at their school, the weather is squally - constant bucketing rain, strong whistling winds AND I needed directions - and I still beat their usual ride to school...?!

It's just TOO amusing....snickering away....still.

Note to self...

2010-05-23T02:31:00.000-07:00

...for future reference...when making pagi popo.....smaller and less buns, more sauce, deeper dish and maybe a lid? KNEW I should've used that GIANT casserole dish - ah well, Thank goodness for oven liners, eh?

"Undercover"

2010-05-22T19:05:00.000-07:00

So night before last I just happened to be strolling past my open bedroom door, on my way to the front room, when something caught my eye....my bed. My pristinely made bed...was messed up. A lot. Totally messed up all down one side. I stopped. And looked. And felt an angry warmth quickly spread through me as I thought "WHICH one of my delightful children did THIS?!?" And then I stepped nearer to straighten the bedspread and stopped. Annoyance quickly turned to amusement. I had heard something. A faint something, but something to be sure. A wheezy snoring to be exact and on hearing this I looked towards the bottom of the bed where now I could definitely make out a smallish mound. So then I got my camera:

and then there is also this beauty:

Who else thinks the exposed belly coupled with bright red face is a good look....?

Snacking on knives...

2010-05-20T20:54:00.000-07:00

Chris' Grandma has a saying she regularly uses - whenever one of us makes some extremely witty quip she says "You must've been eating knives today" (ie. because we - or our "wit" to be more exact - is so sharp - ha!)

Here are some and memorable quips of late:

I was outside weeding the brick path around the garden and Chris came out to tell me it was time to get ready and go over to Mum and Dad's for dinner (he and Monk were going to the movies c/o a Hoyts gift card from Simon and not coming with us). I acknowledged him and said I would be in in a minute. Then he came out re-relayed the message to me, with the same response from me. The next time he came out to re-re-relay the message to me he added:

Fuzz: Is this how the boys muck around in the morning...? Is this the example they follow...?

Me: NO. The boys don't actually do anything productive.

Me = weeding. Weeding= Work. Work = Productive.

SEE

And

....and

See.

PRODUCTIVE.

I told Chris that some heat pump company rang during the day - the conversation went something like this:

Salesperson: Hi, I'm ringing from blah blah heat pump company (I REALLY don't remember the name of the company). We have some heat pump cleaners in your area and were wondering if you'd like your heat pump cleaned?

Me: We don't have a heat pump.

Salesperson: Would you like a heat pump?

Me: No, not at this time thank you.

Chris said - my answer should have been - Why? Are you giving them away for FREE....???